


Hurricane

by firecracker189



Series: Baby Mine [10]
Category: Rhett & Link
Genre: Angst, Angst with a Happy Ending, Fluff and Angst, Gen, Non-Sexual Age Play, Slice of Life, barbara and jade have their own tags thats so cute im gonna die, big brother!Rhett, caregiver!rhett, little!jessie, little!link, middle!jessie, mommy!christy, toddler!Link
Language: English
Status: In-Progress
Published: 2019-06-29
Updated: 2020-06-01
Packaged: 2020-06-04 05:35:11
Rating: General Audiences
Warnings: No Archive Warnings Apply
Chapters: 14
Words: 28,948
Publisher: archiveofourown.org
Story URL: https://archiveofourown.org/works/19411516
Author URL: https://archiveofourown.org/users/firecracker189/pseuds/firecracker189
Summary: Rhett's brain is like a hurricane, tumbling out of control. He never thought this would happen, that he'd leave everyone he cared about, but here he was, driving away.





	1. Chapter 1

**Author's Note:**

  * For [Mythicalstrawberry](https://archiveofourown.org/users/Mythicalstrawberry/gifts), [radiowavemisfit](https://archiveofourown.org/users/radiowavemisfit/gifts).



“Bubba?” 

Link looked up with wide, slightly scared eyes.

“You sit right there for a minute, okay? Just…” Rhett thrust one of many stuffed animals at Link. “Here. Play for a little while. Bubba has to go get some stuff done.” 

After that he more or less fled the room, leaving Link perplexed as he clutched the stuffed giraffe. Locking himself in the bathroom off his bedroom, Rhett ran a hand through his hair and took several steadying breaths. “What…” His stomach churned, his skin was on fire, his pulse was so hard he could feel it in his eyes. “Why?” his hands shook as he splashed water on his face, listening to the sink running and trying to ground himself before this got out of hand. He stood there for a few moments, water running and head in his wet hands before finally verbally directing himself to dry his face. That done, shaky fingers turned off the tap and fumbled at the door till he was back in the bedroom. Rhett’s frenzied mind was a jumble of confusing yet absolutely gutting comments.  _ You’re not good enough. How could you think you could adequately take care of a little one? He doesn’t deserve this.  _ **_Leave. Gotta leave._ ** _ Not good enough.  _ **_Leave._ **

Shaking hands shoved clothes by the wad into a suitcase, passport and wallet going in on top. As he went to zip up the bag, Rhett’s eyes caught the journal laying on the side table. Should he leave it for Link? After all, it was to do with their joint therapy sessions. Everything Rhett had ever learned about being Link’s Caregiver, or things he wasn’t happy with...things that he was insanely happy with. He zipped the suitcase resolutely, panic still surging through him. 

By the time he’d ripped the door open, Link was standing there, pacifier hanging off his tee shirt and looking confused and worried. “Here.” he shoved something into Rhett’s chest and Rhett clutched at it automatically. Apparently it was Big Link he was dealing with.  _ Great.  _

“You...you don’t gotta um, you don’t have to stay,” Link looked like he might cry and Rhett’s panic surged again.  _ Fuck, I made him cry. I’m not right for this. _

“You don’t have to stay,” Link repeated shakily. “But...at least just...take that with you. Read it. It’ll be good for you.” Rhett shoved the book blindly into his bag and stopped short. 

“Um.” Link’s eyes were watery now. “Just...be safe?” 

Rhett felt something tug inside, but he wasn’t sure if it was his own mind or something he felt towards Link. “Yeah.” His voice was animalistic, odd sounding and not his own at all. “Don’t know where I’ll be. I’ll call at some point.” 

Link stood there staring for a moment before his face crumpled and he launched himself at Rhett in a tight hug. “Please,” Link gasped. “Please be safe.” 

Rhett patted his back awkwardly before wrenching out of his grasp in a panic, staring at him for one split second, the image of that pitiful face burning into his mind before Rhett turned tail and fled. He didn’t stop moving until his car was already three blocks away, slamming to a stop at the stop sign and taking frenzied breaths. “Not good enough,” he gasped, shaking from head to foot. “He’s better off without me…” Something that felt like a knife twisted near his heart, but he stomped the gas pedal and kept moving, mind all a blur and body uncertain. 

* * *

Link wasn’t sure how much time passed between Rhett leaving and coming to his senses enough to haul himself out of his crumpled heap in the floor to go grab his phone. Christy. She would help, she knew things. More importantly, he wasn’t sure how long he’d last before he slid back into headspace and it wasn’t good for him to be alone, especially now. Blindly, Link mashed a few buttons on his screen and hoped she got his message. 

**Link, baby, you aren’t supposed to have your phone.**

**_Christy. Emergency. Call please, come home._ **

She called almost instantly. “Link, honey? What’s wrong, where’s Rhett?” 

His tenuous grasp on words went out the window. Just mentioning his name had Link sobbing desperately again. “He-” Link tried hard to force the words out between frenzied sobbing. Something dark and mean and cold was squeezing inside his chest.

“He-left-and-I-don’t--” 

“He left? Oh, baby, I bet he’s just downstairs. Come on, let’s get up and go see.” 

Link felt that horrible hand squeeze tighter on his insides. “ _ No _ !” he choked out, tears sliding down his face. “ _ Gone _ !” 

“Gone?” 

Link let out a desperate groan and tugged hard at his hair. “Left! In the car, took a suitcase and...you gotta hurry! Please come home,  _ please _ , I need you please…” Link babbled on, broken and desperate. 

“Okay! Alright, honey. It’s okay. I’m on my way, I’m getting in the car right now. I’m going to stay on the phone with you the entire time, I’m worried about you.” 

“Not  _ me _ !” Link forced out. “ _ Rhett _ !” 

“I know. I’m worried about him too. Stay away from sharp things, baby. You sit right where you are and I’ll find you when I get home, okay? I’m arming the security system from my phone, okay? That way you’re still safe while I’m not there.” 

Link’s brain was a whirl of confusing emotions and pain, listening to Christy babble on about God knew what while he laid in the floor hollowly, Barbara curled on his stomach and Jade at his side. He’d stopped crying at some point, but he was near catatonic now, laying in the carpet, staring at the ceiling. He didn’t even notice the beep that signalled Christy deactivating the system, or her footsteps coming up the stairs. 

“Link?” Christy sat down carefully beside him. “Honey, are you there?” She rubbed his shoulder firmly and he stirred a little, glancing at her with not-there eyes. Lucky she’d already called Jessie and let her know what was happening. She went to pick up some groceries, more pull-ups for Link, a pack of diapers just in case. Jessie, like Christy, was still in shock enough that she hadn’t even talked to Rhett. At the moment they had more pressing matters, if Link’s mental state was anything to judge by. “Link?” she repeated, more firmly this time. 

“Mm, when did you get here?” his voice was hoarse and soft, eyes still unfocused. 

“I’ve been here for a while,” she replied, frowning. “Come on. Up.” Christy managed to get Link sitting up much to Barbara’s upset. The little puffball yipped and whined and tugged on Link’s shirt. “Alright. Someone needs to feed you two, I get it.” She tugged out her phone and tapped the icon, dropping food for the pups. They scampered off down the stairs to the auto-feeder. “Alright. Come on you. Bath and maybe a nap.” Link gripped at her arms weakly, wobbling as she led him to the bathroom. “Okay, love.” She sat him down on the closed toilet. “Clean clothes. Bath. Then I want you to sleep for a while.” She started up the bath, dumped in bath bubbles and then kissed him on the head. “We’re going to fix this.” She whispered, hugging him. “I promise.” Link gripped at her shirt lethargically, a soft whine escaping his lips. 

“Christy, what if he doesn’t--” 

“Shhh, don’t even think about that. He will. Now let me take care of you. You’ll feel better after you’re all clean and you’ve had a nap. Are you wet?” 

Link’s lip quivered and he burst into tears, reaching up towards her. 

“I know. I know, you had a hard morning, didn’t you? But Christy’s gonna make it all better.” 

She tapped his chin softly. “Come on, sweet boy. Let’s get those clothes off you and get you in the bath.” 

* * *

By the time Christy had gotten Link all cleaned up and dressed in fresh pajamas, Jessie was home putting the groceries away. 

“What the--” She glanced at Link and then licked her lips, taking a breath. “What the heck happened?” 

Christy held Link a little closer and rubbed his back. “I can’t say. Unless we can get ahold of Rhett, I’m not sure we will know. He isn’t answering his phone.” Link let out a shaky whine and she shushed him softly. “Yeah, I know. I know you’re upset, baby. We all are. Don’t worry.” She kissed his head. “Christy’s gonna get you something warm to drink and then we’re going to go take a nap while Jessie makes dinner.” 

“Don’t worry, buddy.” Jessie gave him a forced smile. “It’s going to be okay. But you gotta get some good sleep first, though. Then we’ll have cookies and pizza…” 

She’d taken a gamble and gotten supplies to make two things that Link actually did like to eat. The chip-less chocolate chip cookies and pizza were simply something to toy with his appetite and see if he’d actually eat something. There surely was nothing that a good few hours of cuddles and some shameless bribery wouldn’t fix. Hopefully they would at least be able to even out Link’s mood and keep him from begging for Rhett every two minutes. 

But Link didn’t even rise to the bait, just laying limply against Christy’s shoulder and whining every so often. Jessie exchanged a glance with Christy and Christy shrugged lightly. “Why don’t you go ahead and start making dinner. I’ll try and get him to sleep. Just text me when it’s done.” She made up a bottle of warm milk and carried Link upstairs to her bedroom, wrapping him up in a large fluffy blanket. “Okay, baby. You’re gonna be alright. I promise. Just...let’s relax a little bit, okay?” 

When Link's eight pm wind down time rolled around, Christy and Jessie decided to just put Link to bed. Rhett still wasn’t returning anyone’s calls, and Link had barely eaten a few bites of his dinner. He was right back to catatonic, numbly sitting in Christy’s arms and staring off into the distance. They figured he wouldn't even miss his bedtime routine. 

“If we wait any longer--” 

“I know. He’s going to get sick, but we can’t help him. Until we know what’s going on, we’re going to have to just do our best to take care of him. Now clear the dishes. I’ll take him upstairs and lay down with him.” 

* * *

Just after three am Christy’s phone began to buzz. She’d just gotten Link settled an hour ago, so she moved quickly, not wanting it to wake him. The simple group message to her and Jessie read:  _ Safe. Don’t ask. I’ll call when I’m ready, please don’t push it. I love you all.  _ A soft knock signalled Jessie’s arrival. 

“Did you see--?” She held up her phone. 

“Yes. I saw. Now come lay down. We’re going to need the extra support for a few days.” 

“If we ever--”

“Don’t you start this too. We’ll be fine.” Christy murmured as Jessie climbed up in the bed. 

“My husband is missing. Your friend, and Link’s Caregiver just up and left us all with no warning and no explanation. How does that entail us being fine?” She hissed, eyes watering and voice pitching. 

Link stirred with a little whine and Jessie let her head flop down with a drawn out sigh, watching Christy rub his back until he settled. 

“We’ll be fine, because we have to.” She whispered fiercely. “For him and for you. For all of us. Now go to sleep. Tomorrow we’ll… we’ll see if we can figure this out.” 


	2. Chapter 2

Rhett tossed and turned the entire night. Of course aside from the giant crawling feeling in his skin, his insomnia was acting up. He’d buried Link’s journal in the bottom of his bag, underneath a few shirts. But the more he tossed and turned the more that little book seared its way into his brain. He threw off the covers around three AM and rooted through the bag, grabbing the book. The lamp cast a somewhat frightening shadow as he sat back down on the mattress. 

He turned the leather bound journal over and over in his hands, sighing heavily. 

“Why’d you make me take this?” he asked, thumbing the pages softly. “You know it won’t do any good.” He finally quit staring at the book and actually opened it, turning to the last few of his unread entries. “It’s not going to help.” he repeated, staring down at Link’s rambling script. 

_June 19th:_

_Sometimes I feel like this is a dumb assignment, me writing you letters like I’m not going to see you as soon as I’m done anyways. But I’ll try anyway, today it’s just not happening, so I’m looking at that list they gave us. The one with all those prompts on it in case we can’t get anything written. It says that talking about things you’re thankful for is a good topic so uh, here goes? I guess?_

_This is somehow even weirder. God, sometimes I hate this journal thing. Anyway. Guess I like it whenever you remind me to, y’know, not be a complete and utter brat. Mind my manners and whatever, know that everyone is having a worse day than I am. You always seem to know just how to get me to do the right thing, big or little. I love that. On that note-- sorry for the meltdown the other day. The teeth marks should fade in a few days, but...I really am sorry. I just wanted you to know that those shoes were too tight and uncomfortable but I couldn’t figure out how to say it. You keep telling me not to put these off until bedtime, but guess what? I’m gonna do it anyway. Wish you’d stop yelling at me to turn off the damn lamp and go to sleep. I already have Christy right here to say that. Anyway, goodnight._

_June 20th:_

_I keep thinking about that one time when you caught that catfish with your bare hands, you remember? We were like, twelve or so, you just jumped right in before me, came up out of the creek and went ‘look at this!’ I think i told you that you were officially my hero. Your mom told you to put it back before it gave you catfish fever. I still don’t think that’s a thing. That’s not the important thing anyway, the important thing is that it’s really hard for me to actually say things sometimes. So I’m saying it now: you’re honestly still my hero. I just don’t say it enough. Call me a sap, call me whatever you want, but...there it is._

_June 21st:_

_Today Link wants to let Rhett know a few things that make him happy when Bubba does them: (there were several, so I picked five of them for time’s sake)_

  1. __Link loves it when Bubba gives him cuddles__
  2. _Link loves it when Bubba reads him stories_
  3. _Link loves when Bubba helps him draw pictures_
  4. _Link loves when Bubba lets him help walk the doggies_
  5. _Link loves it the most when he gets to help Bubba do GMM_



_After we talked about that, Link wanted me to make sure you knew that he loves you a lot and that he really wants to go to the park on your day off because he’s been very very good this week. We’ll call you later, for now he’s going to bed._

_We love you!_

_Christy_

Rhett shut the journal with a snap, leaving the last few pages unread. He set it firmly on the side table and curled back up on the bed with a sigh. “I can’t believe I did this. But I can’t go back. I’m not even good enough to go back. What am I supposed to do?” 

\---

Link woke early, cold sweat sticking his shirt to his back. He slipped out of bed quietly, moved across to his room, and got dressed for work. Then he took his keys, and headed up to the office. The only one there that early was Stevie, just starting a pot of coffee in the kitchen. He wandered in dumbly, getting a mug on autopilot. 

“You’re in early. Where’s Rhett?” 

Link visibly deflated. “Please. Don’t ask.” He held out the mug and she filled it. 

The circles under his eyes and the redness clearly said that he was in some sort of state, but she didn’t press it. If things began to spiral later, she’d step in. Instead she watched Link as he walked somewhat stiffly down the hall to their office. 

He sat heavily when he got to his desk, draining the coffee in record time. He looked around the oddly quiet office for a moment or two, until his eyes caught on Rhett’s desk. It looked like he’d never left: jacket on his chair, pile of paperwork in his in-tray, half empty water bottle by the computer. Link pushed to his feet and wandered over to the other desk, trailing his hand across the smooth wood for a moment before sitting down in the chair. He sighed heavily, feeling a wistfulness tugging at his mind, followed by an ugly sort of resentfulness as he began thinking over the situation. Link wasn’t sure which emotion was more forward in his mind as he sat there, feeling small, insignificant, and like the world was spinning too fast. He wasn’t sure what possessed him, but he reached down and opened Rhett’s bottom drawer suddenly. NOrmally he respected Rhett’s privacy, but now? All bets were off, Link figured, fuming a little at the confusing situation. The drawer was filled with the usual suspects: snacks, office supplies, a few of his coloring books and the odd toy. His fingers brushed something cool and he dug a little deeper. A black leather notebook. Rhett’s journal. He’d thought that Rhett had stopped making entries months ago. It was really more of a suggestion for Rhett’s part anyway, he wasn’t supposed to be doing it as rigorously as Link was, since he had no trouble articulating himself. Link set it out on the desk and flipped through it, frowning. Apparently Rhett had been keeping up with his entries as recently as the last week. The latest entry had been crossed out, like he didn’t want Link to see it. Underneath was a normal entry, but it wasn’t quite Rhett. It seemed off.

_June 20th:_

~~_Link can be a handful sometimes. Sometimes he can be a little much, but I signed up for this. Usually I don’t mind. But lately something’s been clawing at my head. I don’t understand. I don’t know how to tell him this, either._ ~~

_Sometimes I think you look at me like I’m worth more to you than I really am. Thanks for the vote of confidence. But I’m not sure I deserve it._

_June 21st:_

_I try as hard as I possibly can to make you happy, I hope you know that. But sometimes I’m not sure I’m the best person to do that. But I really do love you. You have to know that. Whatever else I do, don’t doubt that. Never ever doubt that, Link._

Link stood up abruptly, chair twirling on its axis. He let out an angry snarl and then pushed the contents off the desk, letting them clatter to the floor. 

“What on earth are you doing in here?” Stevie stuck her head in. 

Link whirled around eyes flashing. “I don’t understand!” 

“What don’t you understand?” She asked cautiously. 

“Why would he leave if he says he can make me happy?” 

“Link,” Stevie shut the door quietly. “Did Rhett leave? What’s going on?” 

Link stumbled a little, sitting down heavily. “He left. Yesterday. No explanation. Just...left.” 

She moved over to stand beside him. “Wasn’t yesterday one of your little days?” 

“Yeah. Uh, I was little when he left.” 

“Stop, pause, and back up.” Stevie’s eyes took on that tint that meant she was angry about something. “He left you alone at the house when you were little?” 

“Don’t be mad at him,” Link sounded beyond exhausted. “Please. Just… don’t be mad at him.” 

“Link, that’s not something to be taken lightly. Do you know where he is?”   
“Please. I just...I need some time right now. I’m going for a walk. Please don’t follow me.” He brushed past her, keys in hand.


	3. Chapter 3

**Notes for the Chapter:**

> Am I evil for ending this with a cliff-hanger? Probably. This one hurt. Anyways, find me on tumblr to chat: firecrackerwrites.

Link wasn’t sure how he ended up here, staring out at the expanse of rapidly darkening hillside. At some point he’d had a car, right? He thought he remembered dropping a key somewhere along the trail. But now he wasn’t sure he was on the trail anymore. He’d been walking for so long he’d lost track of time. At some point he’d fallen, he knew that much. The scrapes and blood along his arms and legs spoke of a fall, at least. But Link didn’t remember actually falling. All he remembered was something about Stevie and then this overwhelming  _ emptiness _ that was so crushing he had to  _ move _ , to  _ get out. _

Thirsty. He was thirsty, wasn’t he? 

Link couldn’t tell anymore. 

Hot, tired, thirsty? What did it matter? 

Heavy. Empty.  **_Lonely._ **

**ALONE.**

Dirty. Bloody.

Link scrambled up another peaking hill and grabbed for the crest, pitching a little. His left foot lost purchase against the moving gravel and he slipped, tumbling on his side until he ended up half concealed under a bush at the base of the hill. 

Maybe someone would look for him. He doubted it. 

Nothing meant anything anymore. 

That ugly, crushing, feeling in his chest told him that. 

Link squeezed his eyes shut and felt the dirt on his face turn to mud, his cracked glasses digging into his nose. 

No-one was coming for him. Not ever. Not anymore, not again. 

Nobody wanted him anymore. 

Link was well and truly alone. 

* * *

When Link didn’t come back from his walk, Stevie started to worry. One hour ticked by, then two. By hour three she was panicking, dialing Jessie and Christy, just to make sure he hadn’t gone home. 

“What do you mean he left?”

“Where is he?” 

“I thought maybe he went home,” Stevie couldn’t conceal the terror or the blind shame in her voice. It was sort of her fault that he’d run off in the first place. “I thought he was with one of you!” 

“Okay. Take a breath. Where’d you see him last?” Christy’s voice was smooth and even and even though Stevie knew she was worried, it still somehow soothed her. 

“He was here. We talked in the office and he told me what happened, but..I didn’t think...he just....ran off. I mean he was big when we talked but that’s no clue to where he could have gone. You don’t think he knows where Rhett is and went there?” 

“I think if Rhett wants to hide from Link, Link won’t be able to find him.” Jessie’s voice held a haunting air of finality that made Stevie sick to her stomach. 

“So...rule that out, then?” 

“Dog park?” Christy suggested. 

“Jade is here.” 

“No dog park. What does he like to do?” Jessie wracked her brains. “Biking? Hiking, maybe?” 

“What’s the name of that one trail he likes so much?” Christy asked. 

“Hang on. He’s written it down somewhere in case he’s out and we need him for anything.” Stevie rummaged in Link’s notebook stack. “Aha. Okay. You guys grab supplies, I”ll grab the crew. Between all of us we shouldn’t have to resort to a missing person search just yet.” 

* * *

“Rhett, I swear to God if you don’t pick up this phone right now, we’re getting a divorce.” Jessie was furious as she shoved granola bars into a backpack. 

“Jess, I told you--” when he did finally pick up, he sounded exhausted. 

“I don’t give a damn about you right now. It’s Link. He’s missing.” 

“Missing? What do you mean, missing?”

“Gone. We think we know where he is, but if your sorry ass doesn’t show up so we dont’ get into some sort of court case over this mess, I swear to God I’m going to file for a divorce tomorrow. Get in the damn car and get your ass out to the point.” 

Jessie didn’t wait for further information. She hung up the phone and packed another box of batteries and a spare flashlight. 

“Don’t worry, Link.” She murmured. “We’ll find you.” 

* * *

“Alright, everyone. Here’s the deal. This is where his car is so this means this is where Link was last picked up on the security cameras. We don’t know if he’s Big or Little right now, and that makes this entire outfit more dicey. We don’t know if he took supplies, or how long he’s been out there. But I want everyone to take a map with them and take a partner and fan out. We’re going to find him. If you find him, call Christy first. Let’s go!” Stevie stepped down off the picnic table and sighed heavily. “What’re we gonna do with you two?” she murmured quietly. 

The crowd began to disperse down the trail in twos and threes, Jessie and Christy leading the pack. Chase waited by the trail head, a nervous smile on his face. She nodded and started his way, before the crunch of tires on gravel alerted her to the presence of someone else. 

“Is that--”

“Yeah,” She nodded. “It is. I don’t know what he did this time, but he’s way in over his head. If wind of this gets out to anyone besides us, he’s going to end up in court over this.” 

Rhett hurried over, looking like death itself. 

“Don’t say anything.” Stevie raised a hand. “Just take a map and a flashlight and get to it.” 

* * *

Dark. 

Cold? 

Maybe cold. Maybe just dirt. Dirt and cold and alone. 

Link had been crying for so long he lost track of just how long it had been. 

People. He needed to find people. People would be better. 

Link rolled out from under the bush and pushed to his feet. 

“Gotta find people.” He staggered back up the hill, every bone in his body aching horribly. 

“People.” Link muttered again, not liking how his voice sounded. How long did he have before he became dehydrated? He wasn’t sure. That ugly crushing feeling in his chest just got worse with every step he took. His foot caught on a stone and he fell yet again, angry at everything and angry at his stupid body for not being able to function as an adult human being for more than a few days at a time. This would be easier if he just  _ wasn’t. _

But he was. 

Oh, he _was_. 

Something off to the side made a noise he didn’t like and he pivoted slowly, staring straight into the eyes of a pissed off rattler. Link barely got out a gasp before he’d flung his hands up, shielding his face with his arms. He fought and twisted and snarled, but the snake had already gotten a purchase on his forearm. Another few moments and the snake went flying in the opposite direction. Link panted and flung himself to his feet, staggering several paces up the way. 

So much blood. 

Why had the day held so much blood? 

For the most part, he’d been able to ignore the bruises and scrapes. His brain was numb enough, and nobody cared about him, so why should he make a fuss? But this? This wasn’t just another scrape that dried up in a few minutes. This was…. 

Link felt faint. The last safe part of his brain provided him with the helpful information that if he wiggled out of his shirt he could tie it around his arm and have a loose bandage. But after that was done, he was useless. He collapsed, falling onto his knees and retching into the dirt. He’d lost his glasses in the fight with the snake, and everything seemed threatening in the darkness, just looming fuzzy shapes. Link groaned and shifted a few inches forward to avoid passing out in his own puddle of puke. 

Nobody cared, right? 

* * *

Rhett had pushed himself as hard as he dared. He still felt like he wouldn’t be able to do anything even if he did find Link, but this whole mess was his own damned fault. 

“Link!” he crested another hill and hollered as loud as he could. “Link, answer me! Where are you?” 

In the distance he heard the cries and could see the others’ flashlights as they looked for Link. He could hear Jessie, and Christy and maybe Ellie. Rhett took a deep breath against the tears pricking at his eyes and cleared his throat. 

“Link! Where the hell are you?” 

He’d just about decided to head another direction when a crescendo of noise sounded to his left. A flashlight waved in the air and someone blew a whistle. They’d gained a few volunteers, but Rhett didn’t trust the other hikers. They didn’t know Link. The hikers blew their whistle and Rhett watched as the flashlights began converging quickly on their location. After a moment he headed that way, too. But he didn’t deserve to be involved in this. He deserved whatever the court would dish out. Those hikers should just report him for being the worst at the only thing that mattered: caring for Link. 

* * *

“Are you Link?”

“I found him! Hey! Hey guys!” Something piercing sounded above his head and Link moaned. 

“M’Link,” he mumbled, gratefully sipping the cool water someone pressed to his lips. 

“Link, you’re hurt, okay? We’re going to have to get you to a hospital so we can get you some anti-venom treatments.” 

“Link!” 

_ Christy. _

“Oh, thank God.” 

_ Jessie. _

Link moaned threadily and someone touched his forehead with a gentle hand. 

“Link, it’s alright. It’s Christy, you’re okay. We’re going to get you back down and to the hospital so we can get you checked out.” 

Link retreated into the blackness, let it overtake his brain, block out the pain signals as they jostled him back down the mountain. He cracked his eyes open as they loaded him into Christy’s car, and felt the breath leave his lungs. 

_ Rhett _ . 

“Mm,” he tried to speak but his tongue was too heavy. Christy cradled his head in her lap. 

“Don’t try to talk, love. Save your strength.” 

* * *

Rhett wandered the halls of the hospital, feeling useless. Link was fine, aside from dehydration and the snake bite, a few cuts and bruises. But that didn’t change the fact that he’d almost lost him, because of his own stupidity. What had happened to him? He used to be so good at taking care of Link. He shoved his hands in his pockets and stopped in front of Link’s door. Rhett’s blood ran cold. Two suited people that could only be described as some sort of classification officer sat with Jessie and Christy while Link slept. They conversed in low tones--they hadn’t seen him yet. That skin-crawling, panicked, absolutely inadequate feeling swallowed Rhett whole again as he reached for the door knob, heart in his throat. 

“Are you Mr. McLaughlin?” 

“Yes.” 

“Mr. McLaughlin, we need to talk about your state of mind.” 


	4. Chapter 4

**Notes for the Chapter:**

> HOLY CRAP YOU GUYS  
> this chapter is... SOMETHING   
> I'm hurting. This hurt me.

“Talk about my state of mind?” A slightly hysterical laugh burbled from Rhett’s dry and cracked lips as he raked a hand through his hair. “What, you mean...you mean the fact that I’m fucking losing my goddamn sense?” he made to pace but ended up sitting heavily in the open chair at the foot of the bed, a heavy heavy sigh dropping out of his chest. “Oh,  _ God. _ ” he ducked his head, tugging at his hair in anguish. 

“Mr. McLauglin--” 

“Damn it, call me Rhett,  _ please _ .” 

“Rhett, are you aware of a phenomenon called ‘Acute Caregiving Stress Disorder’ or ‘Intermittent Caregiving Stress Episodes’?” 

He’d vaguely heard of it. Something from the first month he’d been classified, in a pamphlet that now seemed far outdated. Rhett took a deep breath and groaned softly. “Sounds familiar, yeah,” he croaked, letting go of his hair and looking up from beneath damp lashes. 

“Your wife called us, and Christy here thinks it would be a good idea for you to receive interventionary treatments.” 

“What kind of treatment?” his voice took a hard edge, steadfastly ignoring Jessie. “Will I have to be removed from Link’s papers?” 

“If you receive proper treatment over the next two months, you shouldn’t be in trouble with anything to do with your arrangement with Link. You’ll need to spend time with him three days a week to make sure he stays stable, but in order to skirt any court proceedings, you’ll need to stay--”

“I’m pressing charges.” 

All heads swiveled to face Christy. She stared resolutely at Link, not meeting anyone’s gaze as she watched him sleep. “You can’t just run out on your family, no matter how hurt you are.  _ Especially _ not on Link. What you did is horrible, Rhett. I’m sure in time I’ll forgive you, but the return to normal entirely depends on Link. You better  _ pray  _ you didn’t damage him permanently.” She seethed quietly, stroking Link’s hair from his forehead. 

“Jessie?” Rhett’s jaw was near on the floor, pulse racing as he turned to look at her with pleading eyes. She scooted her chair closer to Christy. 

“I agree with her.” She flicked her eyes towards him. “Rhett, I agree with Christy. You…” she licked her lips. “You can’t just...abandon us like that. If you’d waited an hour you could have talked to us, told us how you felt and we’d understand. But Link could have gotten seriously hurt out there, or…” she swallowed hard. “Or God forbid, even  _ died _ out there! You have to get some help, and we can’t offer anything to you anymore. You need help.” Jessie’s voice broke and she pushed to her feet, brushing past them on her way out of the room. 

“Christy?” 

“You need help, Rhett.” She whispered softly, holding tight to Link’s limp hand. “You really need help.” Christy swiped at her eyes with her free hand. “Go with the officers. Please.” 

“Link--” it was half-hearted and tinged with panic as Rhett looked toward the bed with a feeling of nausea. 

“Link’s in good hands. You need to be too.” The female officer spoke up softly. “Come with us, Rhett. Let us help you get where you need to be to help your family again. We’ll set up a court appearance for next week, but for now we’d like to get you checked into a treatment facility.” 

* * *

Things moved both fast and slow for Rhett after that. Everything blurred together as he let the officers take him to his hotel to get his things. They stopped at home long enough for him to pack his bags with clean clothes and get his toiletries. He didn’t look in Link’s room. It was hard enough smelling all the homey smells as he rushed to get out. It turned out the ‘facility’ was more of a ‘rolling green hills’ and ‘lots of nice expensive looking hotel rooms’ than what he’d had in mind. 

“Your wife picked this out. It’s one of our best facilities. You’ll be in great hands with Dr. Forsyth. She’s a miracle worker.” Rhett finished tucking his clothes into the dresser, phone buzzing at his hip. 

“Really?” Rhett took a deep breath to steady his nerves. “She’s gonna have to work a hell of a miracle to get me out of this.” He slipped the phone from his pocket. Stevie. “Hm.” He clicked the message. 

_ Just a heads up, stay off the internet for a few days. Things are...hairy right now. Someone snapped pictures of what happened from the hiking trail, and someone else posted from the hospital before security got them away from the room. You’re about to be in hot water with the entire fanbase until things come out. Even then, I’m not so sure people will come around. You better start praying this turns out alright. I’ll keep you updated, but only as my employer. I’m still not sure how I feel as your friend.  _

He backspaced several times before he finally settled on a reply. 

**That’s fair. Take your time. Release whatever statement you have to, I trust your judgment.**

Rhett tucked the phone away again. “Alright. Take me on the tour, then.” 

“I’m going to need your phone, sir.” The young orderly that had materialized in the two seconds he was typing spoke up suddenly, an apologetic look to his face as he stood beside the officer. 

“Oh.” Rhett blinked. “Okay, then. Uh, here, I guess.” He fished his charger out of his bag and slid his phone back from his pocket. “Why?”

“Because the object of this treatment is to get you more stable before you contact your loved ones.” 

Rhett licked his lips and took a deep breath as he handed them over. “There. Now what?” 

* * *

After everyone left, Christy sent Jessie home for a shower and a change of clothes. She wasn’t going to leave Link’s side until she was sure this entire mess was straightened out. She sat with him another couple hours until the sedative they’d given him started to wear off right around the time Jessie arrived with food. 

“Here.” She set the bags down on the table. “You need to eat something. It’s not much, but you gotta eat. I’ll sit with him.” The tempting smell of McDonald’s wafting over had Christy’s stomach growling. 

“Alright. I’ll make it quick.” 

“I brought him a bag of clothes so we can change him before we head home.” 

“Time will tell whether he wakes up Little or not.” 

“Mm.” Christy made quick work of the burger and fries, tossing the trash into the trash can with a little sigh. “I never thought we’d be here.” Link stirred softly, moaning quietly as he became more alert. “How did we get here?” Christy whispered, rubbing at her temples.

“I’d like to know the same thing,” Jessie said softly, gently squeezing Link’s hand. “Don’t worry. We’ll get there. Just...might take Rhett some time to catch up. I think this is good for him. He pushed himself too far too fast, what with them only having been public with this for…” She peered up at the ceiling, counting mentally. “About a year almost. I think he just went too hard too fast and kind of...burned out. I just hope the media backlash won’t send him right back once he comes home.” 

Christy hummed her agreement. “You know how he gets when those particularly nasty critical comments pop up on content that involves Link when he’s Little. I can’t imagine any of those same people saying anything nice if news of this gets public.” 

“About that.” 

“What?” Christy’s brows tightened. 

“You might want to check your phone. Stevie sent us a message but I assumed you were still concerned with Link. She says it’s already gone public, some guy from the hospital that happened to see Link transferring to a room and then some hiker from the trail when we brought him back down.” 

“Oh damn it all, can’t we just have peace for one second? Can’t they just butt out of our lives and let us handle our problems like a family? Why--” She broke off as Link’s eyes fluttered open. “Link?” Christy hurried to move to the side of the bed. “Baby?” 

Link stirred and moved his head to the side, staring at her softly. “Mm. Tired.” 

“You should be. You’ve had a big day, haven’t you? You ready to get changed and go home?” 

“Home, please.” The sheen to his eyes showed he hadn’t quite forgotten the events of the last few days. 

“Okay,” She whispered, kissing his forehead. “Let’s get you changed. Jessie brought your extra glasses and some comfy clothes. As soon as the doctor comes back we’ll go straight home.” 

* * *

All told it took another hour before Link was signed out and ready to leave. Jessie brought the car around and Link leaned against Christy as she got him into the back seat. 

“W-where’s Rhett?” The soft tentative question came after they’d gotten nearly halfway home. 

“He had to go somewhere, honey,” Christy looked back at him. “We didn’t want to worry you.” 

“C’n handle it. Wanna know.” His tired eyes were earnest as he stared at her. 

“Rhett’s gone to a retreat for a few weeks. We decided to press charges so he could go get intervention.” 

Link looked like he’d been punched in the gut. “You...He…” Link’s jaw worked. “Is...is he coming back?” 

“Of course, baby. Don’t worry. He just pushed himself too hard and needs a little help.” 

“Visitation rights?” Link was choked now, shaking a bit as the full implications began to set in. 

“We’ll have to see what his doctor says, baby. For now I just want you to calm down for me. We’re gonna go home and get you in bed and watch whatever you want, okay? I don’t want you worrying. You’re still feeling bad.” The extra pit stop for electrolyte replacement had her worried, though the nurse had said he was mostly back to baseline. “Do you want this?” She rooted in the bag and pulled out his frog. 

Link snatched it greedily, holding the comfort object to his chest as he burst into worried tears. 

By the time he was safely into his favorite pastel dinosaur onesie and a fresh pull-up, tucked into Christy’s bed, he was still a solid mess. Tears leaked down his cheeks as he watched her move around the room and set up the movie. He’d requested Pooh Bear, and she’d obliged, bringing the dvd up from the basement. The next few days would hold yet more challenges for them, and she wanted Link to be relaxed as much as possible. 

“I love you, baby.” She murmured, holding him close as Jessie returned with her little cup of popcorn. “I love you so, so much.” 

“Love you lots, Link. It’s gonna be okay.” Jessie promised, pretending to feed Jellybean a few pieces of popcorn. The stuffed pig seemed pleased with the offering, not caring that Jessie ate the pieces herself anyway. 

“Bubba.” 

“Yeah, baby, I know.” Christy rocked him a little. “I know.” 

**Notes for the Chapter:**

> Bit of a bottle episode sort of chapter to get the ball rolling. Look for more cameos by Mark, Amy and the gang.


	5. Chapter 5

Rhett sighed heavily and downed the pill with a grimace. “I’m only taking this because you said I had to.” 

The young nurse gave him an apologetic look. She couldn’t have been more than college age. “I’m sorry, sir. But we can’t have your classification getting in the way of your treatment. It’s policy for everyone to take the pills if they’re here for a classification related reason.” 

Rhett shook his head. “I understand. You’re just doing your job. I shouldn’t be mad at you.” He put the cup back on her tray. “Thanks anyway.” he left her to her rounds and strolled around the sweet smelling garden, trying to numb his mind. It didn’t help. All he could think about was how Link would have loved the flowers, the colors, the smells and the little lily pond with the koi swimming around. It all would have been peaceful, if his mind weren’t whirling out of control. 

“Rhett?” 

He turned quickly. 

Another of the girls (were they staffing this entire place with grad students? Where were all the real doctors?) was striding towards him across the lawn. She held a clipboard and had a painfully professional smile on her face. “My name’s Jade. I’m your counsellor.” 

“Oh. Uh,” he scuffed his toe against the grass--it seemed he’d forgotten to wear shoes. “Good to meet you.” Rhett shook her hand. “So what’s the deal with all this? Am I allowed visitors or whatever?” 

“Not family. And not your Little one,” She peered at the chart. “Link. He can’t come until week four. We’ll fill a prescription for him to, send it to your house, just in case he decides he wants to take them. Otherwise he’s going to need a surrogate Caregiver.” 

Rhett licked his lips. “His wife, Christy is a Caregiver. She lives with us too. She’ll make sure he’s in good hands.” 

“I’ll make note. Is there anyone else you can call? A friend, maybe? Someone that could help you through these next few weeks, maybe participate in your group therapy sessions as a support figure?” 

He thought for a moment. “I uh,” he rubbed the back of his neck. “I think so. I’ll need a phone.” 

“You can use the lobby phone. Supervised use only from nine in the morning to five in the evening.” 

“What time’s it now?” 

She checked her watch. “Just after three. Would you like to go now? You have your first session at three thirty.” 

“Yeah,” he sighed. “I guess I oughta go put some shoes on and freshen up after.” 

She gave a light laugh. “Don’t worry. I’ll give you a little time.” 

“What did you say your name was?” they crossed the garden back toward the main campus. 

“Jade.” 

He smiled softly. 

“What’s with the smile?” 

“Link’s dog is named Jade.” 

“Well, Link has good taste in names. You’ll have to tell me about him sometime. My shift ends at eight. Maybe during free time after dinner.” 

“I’d like that.” 

She led him across to the lobby and he grimaced. “You’ll have to tell whoever cleans up that I’m sorry about the dirty footprints.” He gestured and she glanced back to see the tidy row of dirty bare footprints leading from the door. 

“Oh, it’s alright. I’ll tell the staff later. For now we need to get your phone call done and get you cleaned up.” 

“Hello?” Mark held the phone between his ear and his shoulder, continuing to stir the soup. 

“Uh, hey. It’s Rhett.” 

“Hey,” Mark’s brows rose. “What’s up? You needing a babysitter?” 

“Uh, something like that. Listen, I don’t have a lot of time, and I’m sure Christy will explain later. But I need you to do me a favor.” 

Mark’s jaw went lower and lower until he’d stopped stirring the soup and was just sitting in the floor gaping. He told Rhett he’d arrive at the requested time, hung up the phone, and just sat there staring until Amy came in. 

“Hey. Thought you were supposed to be tending the soup.” 

“Got a call from Rhett. He’s in a bit of a jam. I’m gonna have to fly the coop for a little bit, go out to Willow Springs.” 

“Willow Springs?” Amy raised her brows. “That’s--”

“Yeah. I know. Listen, until you hear from Christy, let’s keep that under wraps. I don’t want anyone else knowing anything yet. But he wants me there for his therapy sessions. They won’t allow family.” 

“Okay.” She said with a little frown. “I’ll uh, I’ll hold down the fort, then. You should get out there as quickly as you can.” 

“Alright. Don’t say anything. I’m gonna run and grab my shoes and my wallet.” 

By the time Mark showed up, the session had started. The girl leading smiled softly, waving him into the room. “You must be Mark. We saved you a seat over by Rhett.” 

“Uh, yeah. Sorry I’m late. Couldn’t find a parking spot.” he quickly sat down and gave Rhett a light pat on the arm. 

“Okay, so. Back to our topic. I want everyone to break off in groups of three or four, remember we have thirty minutes for discussion. Rhett, if you’ll fill Mark in on what’s going on.” The chairs scraped and everyone chattered among themselves. 

“So. I take it things aren’t great if you’re in here.” Mark said softly. 

“Things are pretty shit at the moment. I need a few favors. I need you to check on Link for me, and keep things going, keep him distracted. And I need you to come in every day, help me out here. Be my support. Because without a friend, I can’t get through this.” 

“Hey man, listen. I’ll be here, whatever you need. Now tell me what’s going on? What brought all this on?” 

By the time he’d finished explaining, the thirty minutes were up. Rhett was shaking by the time he’d described the earlier incident. Mark looked scandalized and he didn’t blame him. 

“Well, shit.” Mark breathed. 

“Yeah, don’t blame you.” Rhett ran a hand down his face. “This is a real clusterfuck, ain’t it?” 

“Hey. No. It isn’t. You’re going to be just fine, and so is Link.” Mark tugged at his arm. “C’mere.” He gave him a firm hug. 

“I really messed it up, man.” 

“No. You’re gonna be fine. Amy and I will help. We’ll get you out of here, and everything will be fine.” He let go and Rhett sighed heavily. 

“What about the fans?” 

“Don’t worry about that. People say what they want, you know that. But you’re gonna be fine.” 

“I’m not so sure, Mark. I really messed this up. I messed Link up. This entire thing is messed up. He might not even want me anymore.” 

“Don’t even go there. Now c’mon. I think it’s time for dinner or whatever, according to that,” he pointed to the poster on the wall. “Let’s go get some food in you and then we’ll see how things go.”


	6. Chapter 6

“I need help.” 

“What with, honey?” 

“I...Rhett’s in real bad trouble and I....I don’t know what to do. I need help.” 

That got her attention, if Link’s desperate tone since he’d started speaking hadn’t already. “I’ll be there as soon as I can, honey, but you gotta give me more information to go on, Link.” 

Link continued his agitated pacing, Barbara and Jade following him as he moved from room to room. He’d considered taking the pills they’d sent over from that place. After all, it’d be easier to handle things without the complicated emotional layering being Little brought. But..it was also an easy escape. It brought a sort of...disconnect from what was really happening and he kind of wanted that, too. But with Rhett gone he didn’t have anyone to ask, besides Christy. But he didn’t want her, he wanted Rhett. 

“What kind of trouble is he in, Butterbean?” 

“Um.” The nickname got him. He was starting to crack around the edges, and he’d been so good for so many days about not being Little. “It’s um. It’s.” Just thinking about it made him choke up again. “He’s-” Link tried again. He stopped pacing and put a hand to his forehead. “Rhett’s at a retreat because Christy pressed charges against him and he left me alone when I was Little and--” Link’s voice broke. “And everyone on the internet is saying horrible things about him and...and I don’t know what to do.”

“Okay, calm down. Calm down, honey. I love you so much, please don't cry."

Too late. The minute she said that the flood gates opened and he was a mess. He couldn't even get out the 'i love you too' that he wanted to say, because he was crying too hard. Link's knees gave out and he gave a pitiful wail. 

"Baby I need you to find Christy for me, okay? Find Christy and put her on the phone." 

"N-Nana!" 

"Nana loves you so so much, Butterbean. But she needs to talk to Christy and let her know that she's going to come and visit, okay?" 

"Nana, Bubba!" Link insisted, whining. 

"I know baby, I know that's very scary for you. But I'm going to come and help as soon as I can, now I need you to be a good boy for me and find Christy. Can you be a good helper for Nana and do that?"

Link couldn't even move. He dropped his head to the floor and just wailed louder. 

Fortunately the crying brought Christy running to see what had happened. 

"Oh, baby," she sat down and tugged him into her lap. "You've been so good for so long, but being such a big boy is hard on you, baby. You need to let me help you." 

Link nestled into her and cried harder. "Nana." He hiccupped.

"That's Nana on the phone?" 

"Nana."

"Alright baby. You let Christy talk to her okay?" 

She picked up the discarded phone and pressed it to her ear. "Hey. I'm sorry I didn't call you sooner but it's been a little chaotic around here."

"I can imagine. I owe that boy a whooping and a half."

"Don't be upset with him. Please. He's really not in a good place right now and I'm worried. I mean he let Link run off and nearly kill himself on the hiking trail."

"He did  _ what _ ?" Her voice was murderous. 

"That's why I sent him to Willow Springs. It isn't safe for Link until Rhett comes to his senses." 

"Okay. Alright, here's what I'm gonna do. I'm going to take a day and pack up and then I'll be over as soon as I can. That poor little butterbean needs my help. I'm sure you could use a break too. How is Jessie holding up to all of this?" 

"She's livid. She isn't even taking any of those pills and she's been Big for a week. I'm worried about both of them too. Not just Rhett. I could use the extra hands. It's going to be quite the ride once they open visitation rights up. I'm honestly not sure how Link is going to hold up. He hasn't stopped wandering around the house looking lost. It's like he's mad at Rhett, but wants him to come home at the same time. He misses him and whatever is going on in Rhett's head, I know he misses Link too, even if he is being forced to take those dumb pills."

"You make sure that you hide those from Link. I don't want him taking any of them. It's just gonna make him feel worse if he can't escape all the finer points for a while. It's hit the trashy news sites already, and they're not painting it in a very good light. I've got the computer up now and I don't want Link exposed to any of this. He can't handle that right now, so you let Stevie know he isn't going anywhere near the studio for a good while." 

"I will. I'll put them somewhere once he gets down for his nap. He needs a good nap and a nice warm bath. He needs to relax. He's stressed himself out to the point where his appetite is nearly nonexistent." She held him closer and he made a kitten soft sound, reduced to near silent tears now, just gripping at her shirt desperately. "Shh. It's okay baby. You're alright. I'm not going anywhere." She patted his back. "It's like every time he leaves a room or we leave the room he thinks we're gone forever."

"Abandonment. He thinks Rhett just isn't ever coming back. Dear Jesus when I get my hands on that boy…." She huffed an irritated breath. "It won't be too pretty. But I love him. I still love him. I know he needs help, but he needs to know he can't just do that baby like that." 

Christy rubbed at Link’s back. “I just don’t understand what ‘s gotten into him. This isn’t him. He’s always been such a family man, such an effortless Caregiver…” 

“You wouldn’t have known that was him when he first signed those papers. He was a mess. I think I stayed down there for a month nearly, just helping him. It’s hard for me not to be angry at him. But I know he needs help, and I still love him.” 

“We have to stay in this for Link. Just care for Link and...maybe Rhett will follow.” 

“Alright. Talk later. I’ve got some packing to do. You need to get that boy in bed.” 

“Bye.” 

Link whined quietly. “I know, baby. Nana is coming to visit and we can see her soon. But right now we need to get you in the bath. You can play with your duckies and tell me how many there are.” 

Link fell to pieces again--bathtimes were always either fun and games with Rhett, or soft and gentle. It was one of their routines, and she ought to have known that it would cause more problems. 

* * *

"You should eat.” 

Rhett stabbed at the lack-luster pasta with his fork. “Not hungry. Think those pills you guys force down me are messing with my appetite.” 

Jade sat down across from him with a smile. “You want to tell me more about Link? What’s he like? Does he eat his meals okay, or does he fuss about it?” 

He shrugged. “Typically he’s okay, if it’s food he likes.” 

“Does he like pasta?” She pointed to his plate. 

He took another couple bites. “Doesn’t much care for tomatoes, or red sauce.” 

“What does he like?” 

“Honestly?” He ate another bite. “Peanut butter. He  _ loves _ peanut butter.” 

She smiled softly. “I bet he gets pretty messy, huh? You said he was on the smaller end of the spectrum?” 

Rhett shrugged. “Sometimes he coats himself in peanut butter for the hell of it. Just to make a mess.” He shoveled the last two bites into his mouth and pushed the plate away. “Don’t think I don’t know what you’re up to over there. I’ve done it with Link more times than I can count.” 

“Got you to eat, didn’t I? But you do owe me stories about him. I promised I’d listen, and I’ve got time.” 

“Um, yeah. He’s about three, but like...not a normal three. We’ve got this friend, Tyler, and his Little is about Link’s same age but he’s light years ahead of him as far as independence goes. Link’s just...clingier. Weepier, I guess. He’s sensitive. Things make him cry. He’s scared of a lot of things that Ethan--that’s Tyler’s Little--isn’t really afraid of.” 

“But you love him?” 

“Of course I love him!” 

“Then why’d you leave him?” 

Rhett stared at his hands. “I...I don’t know.” Why did he? “I just….I didn’t think that I could...that I could  _ provide  _ for him, y’know? I just...I panicked. I know everyone thinks I’ve lost my mind, and I’m not so sure they’re that far off, honestly.” 

“You’re not crazy, Rhett. But what you guys do is overwhelming, and caring for someone as dependent as Link seems to be can weigh extra sometimes.” 

“He’s never a burden. This isn’t about him.” Rhett got defensive. “It’s about  _ me _ .” 

“What’s about you?” Mark strolled lazily up to the table. “I’ve got those pictures of Jack from when Amy baked with him the other day.” He wiggled his phone playfully. 

Rhett stood up and strode out of the room quickly. 

“Shit. What did I say?” Mark asked, shoving his phone in his back pocket. 

“You didn’t say anything.” Jade replied softly, shaking her head. “He’s just working through everything.” 

“Any idea where he’s headed?” 

“Probably back outside. He keeps saying Link would love the koi pond.” 

“Great. I’ll run grab the notebooks from his room. I’ll make sure we get to the session on time.” 

Mark mashed the elevator button and sighed heavily, dragging his phone back out. 

_ Ames, this isn’t looking good. _

Amy took a moment to respond. She’d taken the boys to the zoo to give Tyler a break for the day. 

**What’s not looking good? Is everything okay? Rhett didn’t...do anything to himself, did he?**

Mark stepped into the elevator and hit the ‘4’ button, barely looking away from his screen. 

_ No. God, no. It hasn’t gotten to that...yet. I’m not even sure I can say it won’t get to that. But we’re taking this one step at a time. I want you to call Christy when you get a chance and let her know that we’re gonna help with Link. It’s just that Rhett keeps trying to blame himself for all of this.  _

**Yeah, I’ll call her once these little monsters are down for naps. Blame himself for what, exactly?**

He strolled down the hallway, biting at his lip and trying to figure out how to formulate a reply based off what he’d heard earlier. Mark fished for the spare key to Rhett’s room and made his way inside. 

_ Just….all this. With Link. It’s like he’s blaming himself for something that happens to all of us. I mean, you know what I struggled with for a while.  _

Mark opened the top drawer of the bedside table and grabbed their notebooks and pens. 

_ I just don’t want him thinking he’s alone in this.  _

It took Amy a while to respond to him. He was back down in the atrium by the time her text came through. 

**Then tell him that.**

Mark shoved his phone back in his pocket and sucked in a deep breath through his teeth. Leave it to Amy to drop a profound statement out there like she wasn’t dealing with two high energy Little ones at the same time. “Okay. I’ll tell him.” 

* * *

“Whatcha doing out here?” Christy shut the door to the deck. Link had been hiding all afternoon, only to surface out on the patio, cradling Barbara to his chest and looking frailer than she’d ever seen him. He shrugged, continuing to run his fingers through the soft fur on Barbara’s belly. Link’s clothes were the miserable mix of ‘not sure which headspace’, half dinosaur pajamas and half jeans. With his mismatched socks and improper choice of footwear, hair standing on end like he hadn’t brushed it at all (he probably hadn’t. It was Rhett’s job), Christy couldn’t help but feel for him. Especially given he was wearing one sandal and one tennis shoe. She sat down on the steps beside him, leaning her shoulder against his. They stared out at the sky in silence for a while, before a gentle sniff alerted her to his turmoil. Christy reached out to put a hand on his arm, but Link shrugged away, holding Barbara closer. His eyes had just become a permanent shade of red now from all the tears, and it broke her heart. She cleared her throat softly. It appeared this would take more finesse than she’d originally figured. Christy leaned into him a little more and fiddled with her wedding ring. 

“It’s okay to hurt, love. We’re all confused and upset by all of this.” She spoke softly against the rumble of a passing airplane, the ambient noise of the passing cars. “But you have to let us help you, Link. Jessie and I love you, and we don’t want to see you handling this in a way that might make things worse.” 

Barbara kicked her feet in the air and Link let her down, watching her scamper over to bug Jade as she napped in a patch of sunlight. He rested his wrists against his knees, hands dangling between his thighs limply. 

“I just want things to be okay.” Link’s voice was defeated, fragile. Christy’s heart broke that much more for him. 

“I know you do.” She assured him, rubbing his arm. “You wanna know a secret?” Link’s dead eyes flicked up to stare her in the face. “I want things to be okay, too.” Christy tugged on his arm till he scooted over enough for her to wrap him in a hug, shelter him from all those thoughts that tormented him. “I love you.” 

“I love you, too.” He responded, the most emotion she’d heard from him in days seeping through in that one comment. Link was silent for a moment, chin resting on her shoulder before speaking up again. “M’sorry I’ve been a brat lately. It’s just...there’s a lot going on. In my head, I mean. Not that there isn’t a lot going on outside my head, too.” He pulled away and gestured to the fading puncture marks on his arm from the snake bite. “But I can’t stop thinking about him.” Link’s voice cracked. “I can’t stop thinking about what I had to do to make him leave like that. Am I...am I not good enough? Am I….Am I too badly behaved for him to want me anymore?  _ What did I do _ ?” He pressed the heels of his hands to his eyes, shoulders hunching as he began to lose control, lost sobs tearing through his chest. 

“Oh, Link,” She whispered, feeling her own eyes begin to tear up. “Honey, none of that is true, I promise you. You’re very good, I promise. Rhett’s just...having a moment right now, is all. But it’s nothing to do with you. That’s not the reason why.” 

“It’s--” he tried desperately to gain his breath. “It’s e- _ everything _ to do with me!” The deadened look in his eye was replaced with pure anger now as he struggled to his feet. “How could it  _ not _ have to do with me? Huh? Explain  _ that _ to me in all your wisdom, Christy!” Link gestured widely with one arm. “Just exactly what part of our relationship doesn’t extend to me? If he left, it’s because of something  _ I _ did. That’s it. Period!” Link was yelling now, chest heaving, tears flowing as he attempted to hide his hurt behind a layer of defiance. It was a moment before he spoke again, voice deadly soft. “It’s all because of me.” Link collapsed to the wooden surface of the deck with a thud, like the weight of his emotion couldn’t hold up to the frailness of his body. He tucked his arms close to his face, as if warding off some unknown assailant. 

“What’s going on? I heard yelling.” Jessie stood in the doorway, looking from Christy to Link with a worried expression. 

“Link is….” Christy slowly pushed to her feet. “Processing. That’s all. Why don’t you take the dogs back inside?” She inched closer to the tangle of limbs that was Link, Jessie skirting around them quietly as she went to collect Barbara and Jade. Tucking one dog under each arm, she quickly moved back into the kitchen. 

“Link?” 

He made some sort of half-pathetic sound and she sighed heavily. Christy’s phone vibrated in her pocket and she tugged it out. It was a text from Amy. 

_ Hey. Thinking about you guys. If you ever need a distraction, we’re here. We’d be glad to take Link out for a while, or come and visit you guys. Whatever works. Just let me know. _

**That’s great, thanks. I actually do have an idea, and I think it would be easier if you guys were along for the ride. We have this cabin, but it’s usually something Rhett takes Link to by himself, for a few days. I was thinking we could retreat up there and get away from it all. Rhett’s mom is coming soon, too. That should give us another set of hands to help. Can you guys make it?**

_ Yeah. I think we can swing that for a few days, minus Mark of course. He needs to stick around for Rhett’s therapy sessions.  _

**I’ll text you the details later.**

_ Great, thanks.  _

Christy pocketed her phone again and sighed quietly as she knelt down on the deck. “Please talk to me, baby,” she pleaded, feeling like she might cry herself. Link gave a pitiful moan and wiggled into her lap, twining his arms around her waist. After several unsuccessful attempts at getting him to talk, Christy gave up and cleared her throat. “Link, baby? How do you feel about leaving this all behind? Just go to the cabin for a while? Get away from all the backlash and just...be?” 

A break would be good, especially if Amy could get the boys to come. They were all going crazy cooped up in their house like this, with the media having a field day with Rhett’s public shame. Jessie needed to get away, too. Nobody had had a decent night’s sleep for days. Christy swayed a little, just holding onto Link tightly, feeling the rise and fall of his chest as he tried his hardest not to break down again. “Let’s go.” She encouraged, pulling back and cupping his cheek. The depths of his eyes held so much pent up emotion it made her stomach hurt. “Come on. Let’s get out of here. I’ll help you pack.” He finally nodded, and she mustered up what she hoped was even a halfway sincere smile. “Good boy.” Christy helped him to his feet. “Let’s go and tell Jessie.” 


	7. Chapter 7

“I love you.” 

Link was curled on the sofa, his head in Diane’s lap. She was stroking his hair softly while Christy and Jessie clattered around the kitchen. 

“I love you.” He muttered back absently. She kept up the gentle rhythm. 

“I’m so glad I’m here, baby. I know this is hard on you, especially coming out here to your happy place.” 

“Everything is Rhett here.” Link turned on his side, pressing his forehead into her stomach. “He bought this place ‘cause we came here so much. Decorated it. Took me here on my birthday for a whole week.” He gripped loosely at her shirt. “Bought me these pajamas and I wasn’t even little then.” The navy flannel check was soft against his legs. 

“I know. But I’m here, and Jessie is here and Christy, and your friends are about to come stay. We’re gonna have a nice time, Butterbean.” She scratched lightly at his scalp and he hummed, a reflex action. 

“M’kay. You do the talkin’.” he murmured, suddenly sleepy. 

“Okay, baby. Do you want to go upstairs and lay down for a while?” 

Link felt suddenly drained at the idea of all that company. He just wanted to retreat for a while, just be with her and have no extra stimulation. “Yes, please.” 

“Thank you for being so polite. Let’s get up. You need some more sleep. You didn’t get good sleep these last few days.” 

He dragged himself up, gnawing at his fingernails as he tentatively held out a hand towards her. 

“Okay. I’m right here.” She took his hand and let him upstairs. “Let’s get you upstairs and then go potty and get you all settled in, hmm?” They’d relocated Link to the guest room, letting Ethan and Jack have Link’s Littlespace room and Diane and Amy share Rhett’s room. He agreed it might be easier to be in the cabin without being surrounded by so  _ much _ Rhett. Rhett had put together that entire nursery with Link in mind, and how many times had they spent together in a blanket fort stretched over the bed in Rhett’s room, with the soft green plaid duvet making everything all cozy? Link wandered on behind her, letting her turn on lights and make all the monsters go away. He wasn’t Little, hadn’t been for days, but it was always there at the back of his mind. As was the desire to just run screaming towards Rhett. Whether he wanted to deck him or hug him, he wasn’t sure. That tended to depend on the day. 

“Alright, Butterbean.” Diane flipped the bathroom light on and gave him a soft smile. “Let’s get your face washed and get you all changed for a nap.” Link stood numbly, relaxing as she washed his face with the warm wash cloth. “I bet that feels good, huh?” She cooed. He nodded. “Okay, honey. You need to go potty now, think you can do that for me while I go grab your pull-up?” 

Link gave another nod. “Um. C’n you get my binky, please?” He asked nervously, fiddling with the drawstring on his pants. 

“Of course, baby.” She noticed his hesitance and sighed quietly. It had been harder and harder to get him to actually use the toilet lately, whatever headspace he was in. She’d have to try a new tack, then. “Link, honey?” He looked up, brows drawn together slightly. She held out a hand. “Come on with me a minute, baby. I think you and me need to talk a little before you go to sleep.” 

He gripped at her hand tightly, looking dazed as he followed her to Rhett’s room. A little whine of protest left his mouth as she shut the door. “I know. I know it’s Bubba’s room. But this is where the rocking chair is, Link. And Nana wants to just hold you for a little bit.” 

Diane let go of his hand for a minute, rummaging in the top drawer of the dresser and opening the closet. 

“No,” he whined, shifting on the spot as she pulled out the changing mat from the closet. 

“Yes, baby. I think you need diapers for a while. You aren’t telling Christy and Nana when you have to go potty, and you don’t want to use the potty when Nana and Christy take you to go potty.” 

Link tried to head for the door, but she grabbed his wrist lightly. “Baby, don’t be a bad boy. Please don’t misbehave. Nana is just trying to help you like she did when you were first classified, remember? Remember how you trusted Nana then? Did Nana say you were any less of a big boy for wearing diapers for a while back then either?” 

Link felt himself plummet towards headspace all the way, chin quivering. “No.” He whispered, and she kissed him on the forehead. 

“Yes, please, baby. Nana’s here, Nana’s gonna take care of you. Now you let Nana get you undressed and then we’ll pick out jammies together.” She knew he probably had to go more than he was letting on. They’d been sitting there for a couple of hours on the sofa, and he’d had several things to drink all day, trying to help keep hydrated with that awful fever. But Christy hadn’t been able to coax him away no matter how hard she’d tried, then they’d needed to start prepping meals for when everyone arrived, so she’d left him to Diane. Fortunately, Diane was a pro when it came to dealing with a sick baby that was stubbornly fighting his headspace.

"Come on, lovebug.” She gently coaxed the shirt over his head, laying it on the trunk at the foot of the bed. “You just let Nana do this for you, okay? Get you all cozy in your diaper and then we’ll just cuddle till you fall asleep.” She slipped the pants off and he held onto her while he stepped out. Turning, she grabbed two diapers out of the drawer with the wipes and the powder, setting them up on the mattress as she spread the mat out carefully. “Okay, baby. Let’s get those undies off and you crawl up.” Link didn’t like having his underwear taken off, whining loudly. “I know, honey. I know you’re cold. But the sooner you listen to Nana and be a good boy, the sooner you’ll be nice and warm again.” Link gave up, crawling up onto the bed. “There we go, good boy.” She murmured, reaching out to tap at his hip softly once he’d lay down. “Lift up for me, honey. Don’t you worry, Butterbean. Nana’s gonna take good care of you.” It took all of ten seconds for Link to start crying again. Once she’d gotten the diaper taped around his hips he’d given in, unable to hold out anymore. “Hey, baby, it’s alright,” She crooned softly, watching the pawprints disappear from the design on the diaper. “It’s okay, Nana knows you needed to go potty. But she’s gonna clean you up and then we can cuddle, okay?” Link let out a soft wail, squirming against the changing pad. 

“Everything okay in here?” Christy stuck her head in. “Amy’s just here with Jack. Tyler’s coming with Ethan tomorrow but they’re not staying the night.” 

“He’s okay. He finally went potty and he’s not happy.” 

“I guess diapers were the secret, then.” She leaned over and kissed his red cheek. “I love you, honey. Be a good boy for Nana and then you can play with Jack after your nap.” She pressed the inside of her wrist to his forehead. “Looks like his fever is waning a bit. We’ll dose him again when he wakes up. I’ll talk to Amy about you-know-what while Jack’s sleeping.” 

“Good. Now you go on and see if you can get Jessie all settled. She needs to drop, too. I’ve got this one.” 

Christy shut the door behind her and Diane turned back to Link. “C’mon, Butterbean. Let’s get you clean.” 

Link gave a little tired snuffle and she rubbed at his belly. “You just calm down. Nana’s here.” 

Once Link was cleaned up and in a fresh diaper, it was evident that the stress had dropped him farther than normal. Diane bundled him into a onesie and handed him his blanket, popping the pacifier in his mouth as she transferred him to her lap in the gliding rocker by the window. He curled up against her miserably and she sighed. “I know, honey. I know. Now you go on and get some good sleep. When you wake up we can all play together.” 

* * *

“Hey.” Mark sat down on the window seat across from Rhett. “Didn’t know where you’d be since it’s raining and you can’t be by the pond.” 

“Link would love that pond.” 

“I know, right? He’d try to touch all the fish.” 

“And we’d have to tell him no and then he’d cry.” Rhett gave a wistful smile. 

“I gotta be honest with you.” Mark settled in more comfortably. “This happened to me too, once upon a time.” 

“You. Really?” Rhett gave a look of disbelief. “You’re like, the most solid caregiver I’ve ever seen, man.” 

“Thank you. That means a lot. But I’m serious. About six years back I hit a real rough patch with Sean. I hired a babysitter on. Tyler helped a lot. But I mean...I thought I was losing my goddamn mind. I was in therapy already, but I called her and told her how I was feeling and she amped it up to several sessions a week. So I get it. I know exactly what’s going on here. I just want you to be honest with me. I care about you, but Link’s a Little, man. And he’s such a little Little. We gotta pull you together for his sake. I don’t wanna see him get assigned a temporary caregiver. Or god forbid get your rights revoked.” 

“I don’t...want…” Rhett’s shoulders hunched. “I don’t wanna lose him. I just….I’m not...good right now. I need some time before we talk about visitation rights or anything.” 

“Okay.” Mark clapped him on the shoulder. “Whatever you need, man. I’ll be here. If need be I can tap Bob and Wade, too. They love spending time with Sean and Ethan, I bet they’d be good with Link, too.” 

“Thanks. I think the cafeteria has apple cobbler today. Wanna swing by, get some coffee before we head downstairs?” 

“Sure.” 

* * *

Link fought sleep harder than ever, until she’d been resorted to bringing out the big guns. Two full lullabies later and he was sleeping deeply. “There we go.” Diane whispered, transferring him to the bed and snapping the rails in place. She ought to have known her son would have installed them on his own bed, too. Link spent as much time in his bed as he did in Rhett’s. 

Diane tiptoed out with the baby monitor. 

“Nana!” Jessie was sitting at the kitchen table with Christy and Amy, painting Christy’s nails. 

“Hi, sweetheart. Look at you being a good little artist!” 

Amy smiled softly. “I don’t think we’ve met. I’m Amy.” 

“Amy, it’s very nice to meet you. I’m Diane, I’m Rhett’s mom.” They shook hands and she sat down, sitting the monitor on the table. 

“We have a spare set of monitors if you need one for Sean.” Christy spoke up. “I’m sorry I didn’t offer earlier.” 

“It’s okay. It’s not like you have a hell of a lot on your mind or anything.” Amy patted her shoulder lightly. “Just tell me where it is and I’ll go get it.” 

“Closet at the top of the stairs.” Amy left the room and Christy smiled softly at Diane. “How’d he do?” 

“Good as gold once he fell asleep. He’s quite a bit younger though. Like he was before you two got married, and right after they got registered.” 

“How young?” 

“Maybe one or so. I bet he stays this way for a while, until things blow over. I’ve read about this, it’s a sort of coping mechanism they use sometimes when they’re sick or stressed. Just go a bit younger.” She sighed and shook her head. “I”m gonna put some coffee on. Later Miss Jessie here can help me make cookies.” 

Jessie perked up. “Sugar cookies? With princess icing?” 

“Whatever you want, Sugarplum.” 

Once she’d finished with Christy’s nails, Jessie begged Amy to let her style her hair. The long soft tresses were just too much temptation for a little girl. 

“Sure, you can style it.” Amy sat down in front of Jessie’s chair so she could reach her hair better. “French braid or mermaid’s tail? I hear you’re really good at braids.” 

Jessie giggled happily. “I gotta brush it first. But I wanna do a mermaid tail cause you’re pretty like when Barbie is a mermaid in the movie.” 

“You think so?” 

“Yeah.” Jessie said decidedly, brushing out Amy’s hair carefully. 

She’d just finished up with her braid when Sean’s fussing came through the monitor. Amy checked her watch. “About an hour. That’s good. You guys want me to check on Link or leave him?” 

Christy stood up, taking another sip of coffee. “Mm. We should get him. He’ll be mad if we don’t let him see Jack.” She cut her eyes toward Diane. 

“Nope. You go on up. Jessie here has to help me make those cookies so we can all have a treat later.” 

“Alright. I’ll go.” 

Amy went into one room and Christy to the other, smiling softly. “Hi, baby boy.” She greeted, seeing Link blinking at her from his tummy, face nestled up against his soft stuffed elephant. “Did you have a good sleep? Nana said somebody was a fussy pants, but you finally went potty. I’m proud of you, honey.” She undid the rail and slid it down beside the bed, rubbing at Link’s back through the soft yellow onesie. “I love you, sweet boy. D’you wanna come downstairs and see Jack and Amy now? Hmm?” Link gave a little wiggle and a lethargic nod. “Okay, honey. Let’s see if you’re dry first, though.” Christy pulled the blankets down and stuck her finger into the leg band of the diaper. “Oh, I think someone’s wet again.” Link fussed quietly, frowning up at her as he pushed up on his hands. “I know, honey,” she cooed with a sympathetic smile. “I know it’s yucky. You let Christy clean you up and then we can go see your friends!” 

Once Link was safely back into his onesie, Christy got his blanket tucked up on her shoulder and wiggled some socks onto his feet. “There we go, handsome. Let’s go downstairs, huh?” She picked him up and he snuggled close with a little sigh, suckling at his pacifier. “Are you ready to see your friends?” Christy bounced him a little as they moved toward the living room, where Amy had laid out a quilt on the floor. “Look, honey-pie, there’s Jack!” 

Jack chewed lightly on the rubber butterfly he held, squeaking excitedly when he saw Link. 

Link wiggled and she put him down on the blanket. “Go play, honey.” 

* * *

Mark licked the cobbler off his lips. “Amy sent pictures of the boys. D’you wanna see, or is that too much for now?” 

Rhett drained his coffee and smacked his lips softly. “I dunno, honestly. But thanks for asking. Am I even allowed to ask if you know what they’re up to?” 

“Don’t think so. I think that guy is legally entitled to take one of your kidneys if you do,” he pointed his spoon towards the table of classification officers sitting by the door keeping watch, one of whom looked like the Hulk’s second cousin. 

Rhett snorted a laugh. “Fair point. I’m not even cleared to have real contact with the outside world yet, so. Besides you.” 

“Speaking of, we oughta scoot, man. We want the good seats.” 

“Meet you there, grab the notebooks?” Rhett dumped his trash. 

“Yeah, man. I’ll go get the seats.” 

“Rhett?” Jade stood just to the side with his pills. “You and Mark need to come with me once he gets down here. We’re moving you on to closed therapy. You still get a friend but this will be more intensive.” 

“Oh, good.” he tossed the pills back. “We gonna get into my internalized issues from growing up in the South now?” 

“Don’t be like that, you sound like a dick.” She took the cup back from him and put it on her cart. “This isn’t about you, remember? This is about you getting back to Link.” 

“So everyone keeps saying.” He shoved his hands down his pockets. 

“That’s why you’re here. Your behavior put him at risk, remember?” They watched Mark come down the staircase. “Alright. You two follow me.” She led them down a long side hallway and into a sort of antechamber outside an office. “Sit here and I’ll go get Dr. Arlow.” She disappeared into the office. 

“So are we in trouble, or?” Mark handed him his notebook. 

Rhett heaved a sigh. “Something like that. We’re moving up a level. We get closed counseling now.” 

Jade passed through the room and shut the door behind her. A moment later a young looking man in a pair of khakis and a logo polo came through with his own leather bound notebook. 

“Rhett, Mark, my name is Dr. Arlow. I’ll be conducting your sessions from now on.” He shook their hands firmly. “Hopefully the goal of these meetings will be to get you back home to Link in a quicker amount of time. We’ll be meeting twice a day, once with just Rhett and myself, and once when Mark gets here before dinner. Sound good?” 

They nodded. 

“Alright. Let’s get started. I’ve read over your files from group session and you seem to be progressing rather slowly, which is why we’ve pulled you quicker than normally from our group room. We feel it would be best to get you into a smaller environment to maybe get you to open up more. But I’d like to start by talking about what prompted all of this. Do you think that you could just give me a rundown on what lead to you coming here, Rhett?” 

Rhett blew out a steadying breath and leaned forward, dangling his hands between his knees. “Uh, I don’t know, really. I mean,  _ here _ here, yeah. I let Link wander off by himself because I flipped my shit and checked into a hotel all alone. But what led to that, I can’t say. Stress? Anxiety? I don’t...I don’t know.” 

“And how did you feel when you left? Was Link alone at home when you left or did you leave him with a loved one?” 

“No uh, I...I kinda left him by himself. I just...one minute I was fine and the next I was...really  _ not _ fine.” He ran a hand through his hair. “I just...racing heartbeat, sick to my stomach, full on panic mode. I couldn’t handle it anymore. I’m not even good enough for him. I just couldn’t spend one more minute there, trying to take care of him, when I know he’s better off with someone else.” 

“And who would that someone else be?” 

“His wife is a caregiver, she lives with us. She’s my wife’s caregiver. Or my mom, she’s a caregiver but she’s never had a little one. Anyone is better than I am. Whoever they are.” 

“Would you ever think about giving custody to Mark?” 

Mark sat up a little straighter. 

“Mark seems to be a trusted friend, and you’ve spoken about him having a little one at home.” 

“Now hold on.” Mark murmured. 

Rhett sat back in his chair and stared over at Mark. “Yes.” he said finally. “Yes, I have.” 

“Listen, man,” Mark spun slightly so he was facing Rhett, an earnest look on his face. “I love that you would trust me and Amy with Link, I  _ really _ do. He’s a delightful kid to have around, but...we’re not his caregivers.  _ You _ are. If he bonded with you even before you registered, then you two are biologically suited to each other. That means even in a room full of me’s and Amy’s, he’d still have chosen you, regardless of your history with each other. Not me, not Christy, not Amy.  _ You _ . Now I know aside from all this bullshit you really do love him. Deep down, you’d do anything for Link. I know you’re having a rough patch right now and I get that, believe me, I do. But you gotta prioritize, man. Link fucking loves you to death. He thinks you hung the goddamn moon, and I won’t let you let him down like this. Whatever it takes, I’m getting you back to where you were. Hell, better than you were, even. But I’m not letting you run in the opposite direction from this anymore. Do I need to remind you about that snake bite again? You gotta get under control, man. And I say this with all the love in the world. I care about you. And I’m not going to just let you throw all this away for a few days worth of panic.” He held his arms out. “Now bring it the hell in. You need a good hug, a good talk, and a good night’s sleep. Tomorrow we’re gonna kick this in the ass.” 

* * *

“Link, you wanna cookie?” Jessie held out one of her painstakingly decorated cookies. Link squirmed in the high chair and let out a whine as Amy wiped off his face. “I know, I know Amy’s so mean, isn’t she?” Amy crooned. “Give him half, Jessie. Jack can have the other half. We don’t want these little guys up all night.” 

Jessie happily broke the cookie and scampered around the table, handing each baby one half of the garishly pink iced cookie. 

Link kicked his feet and Jack squeaked with pleasure as he nibbled at the cookie. 

Christy washed the dishes and Diane dried, Amy supervising the kiddos. 

“Amy, they like them!” Jessie did a little dance. 

“And why wouldn’t they, princess?” Amy asked, taking a large bite of her own cookie. “They’re delicious! And so pretty!” 

Jessie giggled and pretended to feed Jellybean a bite, the trusty rainbow pig seeming to enjoy his as well. They all happily milled around, eating cookies and drinking decaf while the babies played in the icing on their high chair trays. 

Amy made sure to take lots of pictures to send to Mark, feeling an ache in her stomach that he and Rhett weren’t there to enjoy the blissful scene. “Alright.” She sighed once Link started to get fussy at the sensation of the icing against his skin. “Guess these two need baths and bed.” 

Christy hummed. “Diane? You wanna take this one or should I?” 

“I’ll go. You gotta go get Jessie ready. I promised her we’d watch one of her Barbie movies before she goes to bed.” 

Jessie stood up and hopped around happily. “C’mon, Momma, I want the nightgown with the tutu on it!” 

“Alright, princess. Settle down. I’m coming.” 

After that it was complete chaos. There were two bathrooms upstairs and three bedrooms. Jessie’s went quick enough since she could shower, but Link and Jack were nearly in tears by the time their baths were over. It had been a long day for them both: Jack with the travel and Link with the hard crash into his headspace. 

  
“Come on, Butterbean,” Diane crooned softly. “You behave for Nana, be a good baby.” Link squirmed on the changing mat and cried his poor little eyes out, frustrated at the fact that he had to be actually dressed and diapered before he got in the bed. “Oh, I know honey. Nana knows you’re tired. She’s gonna get your white noise machine going and give you a binky, and you’ll be right as rain in no time.” She quickly got him into the sky blue footed sleeper and bundled into her arms. “Bedtime, baby. Bedtime for Link.” She tucked him into the guest bed with his elephant, his blanket, and his giraffe. They hadn’t bothered with his bumblebee or lots of bee themed things in the guest room, being uncertain how he’d react if it triggered memories of Rhett. She gave him his blanket. “Go off to dreamland, munchkin.” She flipped on his noise machine and Link’s lashes began to flutter. “Tomorrow will be a happy day.”


	8. Chapter 8

“Link?” 

Link continued to sit on the blanket, listlessly giving the toy keys a shake every now and then. 

Jack kept mouthing at one of his hands, staring curiously over at Link. Even Jack was starting to pick up on the fact that something was going on with Link. 

“Link, honey?” Amy squatted down in front of him. “Baby, do you wanna say hi to Mark?” 

Jack’s eyes lit up and he gave a squeak. “Not you, munchkin. You’ll get a bedtime call tonight. Link needs daddy right now.” She held the phone out and Mark smiled at him. 

“Hey, bud,” Mark sounded far away, tinny with distance. “Are you feeling better? How are you? I see you got your keys, there. Are those any fun? Jack likes to shake his around, make music with ‘em.” 

Link’s dead eyes brightened just a bit at seeing Mark’s face. He gave the keys a half shake and blinked softly. 

“I miss you, bud. I’ll try and come visit you soon, okay?” Link gave a little wiggle, seeming to engage a bit the more Mark talked. He’d taken to Mark the first time he’d met him. Mark kept speaking, noting the way Link appeared to come alive. “Ames, I think I might be making a call to two little boys tonight at bedtime, what do you think?” 

“I think so. This is the most alive he’s been in days. Keep talking to him a while, see what happens.” 

By the time Link started to get sleepy for his first nap of the day, Mark had talked to him for a good ten minutes, and Christy and Diane were elated. Link was showing signs of life again, smiling and engaging and showing Mark all his toys. 

“Okay, alright that’s very nice, Link. I bet your giraffe friend is very soft, I’m really glad to meet him. But I think it’s time for nap now. Can you go be a good boy for me and take a nap? I promise I’ll call again later, okay? After dinner.” 

Link whined. 

“I know, bub. I know it, you’re just so sleepy. You need to go to sleep, okay? Go be a good boy for Uncle Mark and take a nap. I love you.” 

Link signed ‘Mark’ and ‘love’ several times in a row, every Caregiver in the room unable to stifle a few ‘aw’s. 

“I know, buddy, I love you too. I’ll talk to you later, okay? You go and be a good boy, take your nap.” 

Amy ended the call. “Okay, munchkin. Time for naps. Let’s go up.” Amy held out her arms and Christy swapped Jack over to her. 

“Come here, sweet boy,” Christy picked Link up off the rug, nuzzling at his cheek. “I love you. I don’t know what I’d do if I hadn’t had you in my life.” Link curled close to her. “Yeah, you’re sleepy, hmm? Come lay down with me and I’ll read to you before you take your nap.” 

* * *

“What was that?” Rhett shoved the cup of coffee across the table towards Mark. 

“Nothing. Just a little problem with Jack.” He lied smoothly, accepting the coffee as he sat down again. “Hey, listen. How’s your journal coming along? You thinking you’d be ready to maybe start thinking about scheduling visitations in advance?” 

Rhett fiddled with his napkin. “Not sure yet.” he gave Mark a tired smile. “I’m getting there but...I’m not ready just yet to talk about that.”

“I understand. I just hate seeing you like this, man. This isn’t you.”

“I know. It’s not me and that’s what scares me.” 

Mark sipped at his coffee idly. “You gonna want me in the room today, or?” 

“I might try to do it alone for a while. But sit tight just in case?” 

“Course I will. I brought my laptop so I can sit down here and work until you need me. Just have them page the front desk and I’ll come up.” 

Rhett nodded and shoved his hands in his pockets. Mark watched him meander towards the staircase, hesitating a moment before mounting the bottom step. 

Every time Mark drove over there the stark contrast between the shiny metal gates and the horribly professional looking sign got to him. ‘Willow Springs Retreat: Helping Littles and Caregivers Reconnect Since 1990’. Yeah. Sure. That wasn’t intimidating or anything. That coupled with the long well lit drive and the regulated parking, the visitor’s passes...everything about it had an Arkham Asylum vibe that Mark hated. 

“Abandon all hope, ye who enter here,” he shook his head and mumbled under his breath, adjusting his laptop across his knees. He sipped at his water and worked through his backed up emails. Before he knew it the entire hour was up, and Rhett was coming back down the stairs looking exhausted but somehow vaguely better than their last five sessions put together. Mark shut his laptop. “Hey! How’d it go up there?” 

Rhett sank into the opposite chair and sighed heavily. “They keep wanting to push visiting with Link.” he looked down at his hands, staring at his wedding band like it was a foreign body. 

Mark licked his lips. “And uh, how ya feelin’ about that?” 

“I don’t know. I just...I don’t know. These damn pills are messing with me and everything’s so regemented and confusing and I up and fucking left him out there like I didn’t give a damn!” 

“Do you?” 

“Do I what, Mark?” 

“Do you give a damn about Link?”

“Yes.” 

“Then there’s your answer. That’s the only thing that matters. YOu answered that question with absolutely no hesitations. That tells me all I need to know about how this situation is going to turn out. You love him to death, Rhett. Your entire existence is tangled up in his, and you’ve done a great job with him thus far. But you’ve hit a bump in the road. So what? We all do. It’s how you recover that matters. You’ve been dancing around this for weeks now. It’s been two whole weeks and you’ve done nothing but be noncommittal and worry about how he’s gonna take it. You want my advice? Go for it. Do it. You’re not gonna get out of this place without agreeing to their terms. It’s all about protecting Link, here. Everything in this place is for the legal protection of the Littles. I know you want to see him. I can see it in your face. But you’re going to have to actually see him for a little bit and start working through this with him. You’re gonna have to get up to your joint therapy with him before long. That’s the only way you can combat this.” 

Rhett looked up at him. “Have you talked to Stevie?” 

“You know she doesn’t want me telling you anything about this. But it’s safe to say you can assume there’s a war going on with the fans right now. But I think you can recover from this if you’re open and honest about your journey once you’re back on social media.” 

“I’m exhausted.” 

“Yeah. I know. Listen, I gotta head back for a little while, let Chica out. You oughta go rest up. I’ll be back after dinner.” 

“Sounds good.” 

* * *

“Can’t we go outside?” Jessie stuck her head into the room. 

“Have Nana take you on a walk, baby. Maybe take the dogs too. I think the boys are too Little to go out right now.” Christy answered absently, attempting to work a clean onesie over Link’s squirmy form. “Link, hold still for me. Come on, just a little more and you’re good for a while, I promise.” 

“Okay, but I wanted to be with you.” Jessie left the room. 

“Well this won’t turn into a meltdown later or anything.” Christy muttered to herself. “Good boy, there we go.” She tugged the garment down and got it fastened. Link pouted up at her. “I know, I know. Christy’s mean for making sure you didn’t get cold.” She hefted him up. “Now come on. You two little munchkins need a snack and then some good cuddles, how ‘bout that?” 

The hotness of the cheek he pressed against her neck made her heart ache. He was near about constantly sick now, fussy, in a bad mood, and looking around waiting on Rhett to walk in the door. Christy was up late into the night soothing him, then up early in the morning waiting for a call from Willow Springs. They said they’d call when they made progress, but it was nearing on a month now, and the lack of call worried her. Hadn’t Rhett made any progress? They said they had the best program in the state, so what was taking so long? Why hadn’t they called and said Link could see him yet? Had they done something wrong by sending him there? 

“Mm.” The hand patting at her leg drew her out of her thoughts. 

“Well hey there, little leprechaun.” She said affectionately. “Where’s your mama? What’re you doing off your play mat, huh?” Christy descended the last stair and patted Sean on top of his fluffy head. “Come on you, back in here, let’s go,” She gestured and began walking toward the living room. He trailed along behind her, crawling slowly and carefully. Christy put Link down on the soft mat. “Okay. Now you.” She moved Sean over and sat him down. “Maybe you two should be in a play pen so you don’t wander off when our backs are turned.” She turned towards the kitchen. “Amy!” 

“What?” 

“Where’s that portable play pen?” 

“I think I put it in the closet by the stairs!” 

Christy rummaged through the mentioned closet until the bright blue rails came into view. “Okay. Safety first for you two.” She began setting up the clip-together railing set around the mat on the floor. “There. Now two little boys won’t go off on their own.” She clicked the gate into place and two sets of eyes looked up at her with equally pathetic pouts--forgotten quickly when Amy appeared with two bottles in hand. 

“I think you’re gonna like what I have a lot more than what Christy just did.” 

Sean let out a little squeak and pressed up against the barrier, making grabby hands up at her. Link just continued to sit listlessly, looking flushed and exhausted. They knew he was hungry but he made no move to even pretend to be interested in the bottle Amy held. 

“Okay, time for bottles.” Amy pressed on, ignoring the pinched look on Christy’s face. She handed off the spare bottle to Christy. 

“Come here, love.” Christy tried to coax, reaching out to Link. His eyes watered and he burst into tears, turning away from her as he curled in on himself. She crouched down, opening the play pen up and reaching out again. “Link,” she said softly. “Baby, please come drink your bottle for me. I hate seeing you upset like this, baby. Please come sit with Christy and have some good cuddles.” 

Amy had already migrated to the sofa with Sean. It took her a good ten minutes to get him calmed enough to crawl over to her. 

Christy gave a reassuring smile. “There we go baby boy. You come over here and Christy will wipe your nose, and give you your bottle, and you’ll feel so much better.” 

Ten minutes of constant cuddling later and both boys were asleep. Christy had dosed another dose of fever reducer and Link was curled in her lap. “Good boy, baby.” 

* * *

“Man, I gotta tell you something. I can’t keep it in anymore, I’m sorry.” 

“And what would that be?” 

Mark leaned forward. “It’s Link. He’s been so sick since all this started and Amy says she can barely handle it anymore. I didn’t want to push it, but since you said you were ready to move forward with visitation rights…” He shrugged. “You haven’t felt anything because you’ve been taking those pills. But Link? He’s just too Little for this, man...he can’t take much more. I’m begging you to do something before it gets any more out of hand.” 

“I...didn’t even think of that.” Rhett said softly. 

“I don’t think you’ve been doing a whole lot of thinking at all lately, to be honest.” 

“You’re not holding back, are you?” 

“I can’t. Not for his sake.” 

Rhett blew out a breath. “That’s fair. I’ve been stalling. I have to consider what he needs. And right now what he needs is...me.” 

**Notes for the Chapter:**

> As always, find me on Tumblr: firecrackerwrites


	9. Chapter 9

“Hello?” 

She’d just gotten Link settled with his blankie and some more medicine when her phone rang. 

Christy stuck it between her shoulder and her ear and continued folding laundry. 

“Christy, this is Liza with the Classification Bureau. I’m calling in regards to Rhett McLaughlin.” 

She set the laundry down, gripping at the phone tensely as she dropped into a kitchen chair. 

“Uh, yes. Yes, has um...has he made any decisions?”

“Rhett’s been making fine progress. We just received word today that he wants to begin setting up a visitation schedule this week.” 

Christy pushed her hair behind her ear, licking her lips as she glanced into the living room where the boys played softly. “That’s… that’s amazing, uh, when...when do we start?” 

“Tentative schedule has him able to leave the center on Wednesday and come see Link for a one hour supervised session.” 

“What time?” 

“Between twelve and one.” 

“That’s Link’s nap time, can he come at around ten? Link will have eaten breakfast and been awake for a while then.” 

“Ten it is. You’ll need to be present as well as Rhett’s Classification officer and anyone else that you’ve authorized to be present for his therapy sessions.” 

“Uh, we have friends over. Do they--”

“They’ll need to leave for the sessions, so that Link can have time with Rhett as much as possible.” 

“Okay, I understand. Thank you for calling. I have one more question. Will this be the same every week?”

“Eventually it will be twice a week when we think Rhett is stable enough to think about heading home soon. But for now once a week same time every week so Link doesn’t get confused.” 

“Thank you. Goodbye.” 

“Goodbye.” 

She stood up and gestured to Amy. 

“What is it?”

“That was the classification Bureau.”

“And?”

“And...Rhett wants visitation. They’re coming Wednesday morning at ten to eleven. You guys will need to be out, as well as Jessie and Diane. I’ll stay behind and I think Mark will be here too.” 

“I understand. We’ll take the kids for a walk or something. Listen.” She hugged Christy softly. “I’m really happy to hear this. Maybe soon Link will start feeling better.” 

“Let’s hope.” 

* * *

By Wednesday morning Rhett was a nervous wreck. By the time Mark showed up at eight am he was pacing the lobby. 

“Hey, listen, things are going to be fine.” Mark gave a reassuring smile. “I promise. It’s Link we’re talking about. Even after all this, he’ll probably still forgive you for it. He’s devoted to you.” 

Rhett made a face. “I don’t think he’s gonna let this one go so soon, I mean if he’s as sick as you say he is, then he’s gotta be pretty pissed off.” 

“I wouldn’t say that, exactly.” Mark rubbed at his chin. “It’s more like he’s just confused and sick feeling. He just feels bad and he’s confused.” 

“Confused?” Rhett’s stomach sank. 

“Yeah. Looking for you and you aren’t there. In his mind, if he’s Little, you’re always there.” 

“And...and I’m not there.” Rhett sank into one of the armchairs. “God, I’m screwed up. I shouldn’t have done this, man.” 

“Yeah, but we’re going to the cabin to make it right later. So stop moaning and get happy. We get to see him later on.” 

* * *

Link knew something was up the moment he woke up. He surfaced mildly, feeling disoriented and confused in a way he didn’t remember feeling as a grownup in a long time. 

“Christy?” 

“Hey, welcome back.” She kissed his cheek. 

“Mm, sick.” 

“Yeah. Let’s get you some more meds and get you in the bath.” 

“What’s going on?” 

She gave him a soft smile. “Don’t worry, love. Everything is okay. I promise. Just trust me, okay?” 

He let her help him out of bed and towards the bathroom. “Um. Okay.” truth be told, Link was too tired to argue, or really talk much. Talking took energy he didn’t have. It was far easier to just let Christy clean him and give him medicine. After she got him dressed in some comfortably neutral sweats (he wasn’t even going to protest the diaper, he didn’t have the energy to make it that far if he had to go to the bathroom), she took him downstairs and sat him on the couch with a nervous smile. 

“Where’s everyone?”

“You wanna eat something real fast?” 

“Christy,” He grabbed her arm lethargically. “Where?”

“Rhett is coming. Your first visitation starts today.” 

“Um. When?” 

“They’ll be here in thirty minutes. Everyone else is taking a walk. It’ll be me, you, Rhett, and Mark.”

“That’s where he’s been. I wondered why Amy and not him.” 

“He’s been helping Rhett. Do you want any oatmeal, maybe a granola bar?” She tried again.

“Not hungry,” he mumbled, looking like he felt like shit as he hunched into the sofa. 

“Fine. But drink some water. Cup or bottle?” 

“Need a lid.” 

“Okay, cup it is.” She came back a moment later with a sippy cup full of cold water. They sat like that until the knock on the door made him flinch. 

“Settle down, love.” She kissed his cheek. “I’ll be right here.” Christy trailed across the room and opened the door. Mark led the party with a soft smile. 

“Hey, bud. How ya feelin’?” 

Link shrugged and put his cup on the coffee table. 

“I don’t get a hug?” 

Link scurried over and hugged him tightly. “Missed you, Mar’.” He mumbled. 

“I know, buddy, I missed you too. Lots and lots.” 

Christy shut the door and Link let go of Mark like he’d been shocked. A look of determination overtook the previous pout on his lips. 

Rhett stood by the door, hands in his pockets and a sheepish look on his face. 

“Hey, Link.” 

That was all he had a chance to say before Link flew across the room, dealing a blow that knocked him off his feet. 

“Link, what the--” Christy made to move towards him, but Mark held her back. 

“Let him vent. They need this.” 

Rhett clapped a hand to his bleeding nose and rolled onto his side, pushing to his feet. “You’re right. I deserve that.” 

Link reeled backward and hit him again, sending him staggering toward the door. “I deserve that, too.” He murmured softly, once he’d recovered. “You gonna hit me again, Link?” 

Link’s chest was heaving as he took in labored breaths, flushed and shaky on his feet. He stared at Rhett for a moment, then surged forward, wrapping his arms around him tightly. 

Rhett held him tight. “Gosh, i sure did miss you.” 

“You  _ left _ .” Link mumbled accusingly, smashing his face into Rhett’s shoulder. 

“I did. I’m so sorry for that, buddy, I really am. I love you so much but I guess i just forgot for a while how much.” 

“You  _ left _ .” Link let a whine creep into his tone. 

“I know.” Rhett held him tighter. “I know I did. I did leave, didn’t I? You don’t deserve that. I love you so much.” 

“You left.” Link felt his strength go completely, biology winning out over his own grudge. 

Rhett followed him down to the floor, just holding him close and whispering softly to him. Link had started to sweat again, his head tucked right up under Rhett’s chin as he clung to his shirt. 

“I love you so much, Link. I missed you so much.” 

Christy hated to break the moment up, but the officer was insistent on keeping to the one hour time limit. 

“Pass him here,” She reached out. Rhett stood and kissed Link’s head, handing him over. 

“Has he been this little the entire time?”

“He has. He’s very small.” 

Link whined his displeasure around his binky. 

“I know, bo. I’ll be back soon, okay?”

“He looks a lot better,” Mark commented, walking over to the door and hugging Link softly. “Love you buddy.” 

“He does,” Christy agreed, watching Rhett move slowly towards the car. “See you later?”

Mark nodded and kissed her softly on the cheek. “Hang in there. This will all be over soon.” 

**Notes for the Chapter:**

> If you want to talk or send asks, I'm all ears! firecrackerwrites on Tumblr


	10. Chapter 10

“Hey, Link.” 

Link turned, hands in his pockets. He’d been standing out behind the cabin for half an hour in the light rain. Rhett didn’t tell him he’d been watching for five minutes before he finally gained the courage to speak up. Link eyed him from his spot a few feet away, hood tucked safely up around his head. 

“What do you want, Rhett?” 

He sounded exhausted, empty, like the effort of keeping himself upright was costing him everything he had. 

“I thought you’d at least want to talk or something.” Rhett came down the steps of the deck, advancing till there was only a foot between them. “I get two hours today. They keep bumping it up every time. Don’t you want to talk?” 

“Talk about  _ what _ , Rhett? The fact that you abandoned me? The fact that I lost my fucking mind because I can’t be away from you for more than five minutes? Or how about the fact that while I was out of my goddamn mind, I nearly died in the fucking desert? How about the fact that when she thinks I can’t hear it Christy cries at night? Or how Jessie actually considered getting a divorce over this?” Link’s words, while tired, were filled with an underlying fury Rhett knew he deserved. Link gestured widely and set his jaw. “When you’re ready to answer that, you just let me know.” He made to brush past Rhett, his damp shoulder bumping against Rhett’s and leaving a dark spot against his light sweatshirt. 

“Link, wait.” 

Rhett grabbed at his arm. Link halted his forward movement, resolutely staring ahead at the house, where he could see Mark through the window chatting with Christy. 

“What do you want, Rhett?” he parroted his words from a moment earlier. “Can’t you see I’m trying to get inside?” 

“Link,” Rhett felt his resolve crumble, his heart break just that little bit more. “Link, I’m trying to say I’m sorry.” He gripped lightly at Link’s sleeve, afraid he’d disappear into thin air if he let go. Or storm off and never return. “I’m sorry, Link. I’m sorry, I’m sorry, I’m  _ so sorry _ …” Rhett felt his voice break, ducking his head to stare at his shoes in the rapidly forming mud. The rain fell harder for a few beats, accentuating Link’s silence. But he hadn’t moved, that was a good sign. 

“ _ Rhett, _ ” he wasn’t sure he remembered Link turning around, but somehow there he was, tentative hands reaching out and becoming bolder as he yanked him in for a hug. Link’s fingers gripped at the shoulders of his shirt, arms deathly tight around him as he buried his face in Rhett’s shoulder. “Please don’t cry, brother.” It was soft, muffled, and  _ so so Link. _ Rhett gripped him back tightly, holding on for all he was worth. 

“Can’t help it.” Rhett mumbled, feeling the rain snake down his collar in rivulets of grounding coldness. “I did somethin’ bad, Link. I cracked like a fuckin’ pistachio, man. And you guys paid the price for it.” Rhett sniffed a few times and felt Link lean into him. “That ain’t okay. I love you guys.” He raised a hand to grip at the back of Link’s neck softly. “But I hurt  _ you _ especially.” he blinked, the tears against his cheeks creating an odd warm/cold combo with the rain as it fell harder. “And that’s definitely not okay.” Rhett put his mouth right next to Link’s ear, just in case the storm meant he couldn't hear him. This was important. He had to make amends, to start building that bridge back somehow--that fragile bridge he’d burned so thoroughly. “Because you’re my boy. And I love you.” Rhett felt his breath catch in his chest as the words tumbled out, pain clawing deeply at his chest. “I love you so so much, Bumblebee.” They stood like that for a moment or two, holding tight until the thunder started. 

“W-we should go inside!” Link pulled back and spoke louder over the storm. “We don’t wanna get struck by lightening!” 

Rhett nodded, slogging through the puddle of a backyard. Link moved fast, attaching himself to Rhett’s sleeve and moving beside him. 

“You two are gonna catch your death.” Christy was there instantly with towels, as soon as they stepped under the porch. “Get in here and get in a shower. Change clothes.” 

They did, though Link looked so fragile Rhett moved double time, just in case. He didn’t like leaving Link alone after what had just happened. They emerged into the hallway at the same time, Link looking awkward and hopeful as he tugged at the sleeves of his clean hoodie, pulling them down over his hands. 

“Hey.” he said, and Rhett lost it again. 

“Hey yourself,” he closed the space between them and wrapped Link in a tight hug. “Don’t do that. Don’t you do that to me. Not now.” Link nosed into his neck, gripping handfuls of his shirt and tugging him as close as possible. 

“I  _ really _ missed you, Rhett.” 

“I know. I’m sorry.” 

“Stop apologizing and just fucking hold me. I haven’t been able to stand like this for days. Lemme have this.” 

“Okay.” Rhett pointedly tried not to think about what that comment meant, about how impacted Link had clearly been and how much time he’d spent in a younger headspace because of what Rhett had done. They stood for a few minutes, just reacquainting themselves, before Rhett moved. He rubbed Link’s back firmly. 

“You need to eat.” 

“Not unless you do.” 

“I’m right here.” 

And he was, the entire time they ate their peanut butter sandwiches and water. Link kept looking at him like he was too good to be true, and Rhett kept beating himself up for it. He’d made the sandwiches quickly, doing everything himself just for Link. Link hadn’t let go of his sleeve the whole time, until they sat at the table. 

“I miss you.” 

He wiped at his mustache and put the napkin aside. “I know.” 

They stared at one another for a few minutes, unsure of how to proceed. Rhett glanced at the clock over the doorway. 

“We got another hour. What do you want to do?” 

“I want things to be normal again.” Link’s voice was that pinched mixture of ‘Little and hopeful’ and ‘Big and realistic.’ 

Rhett heaved a sigh and pushed his chair back. “So do I. We’ll get there.” he held out his arms. “Sit with me?” 

Link slipped over into his lap, but it didn’t feel natural anymore. It felt awkward and forced and nothing like what he remembered. Link lay his head on Rhett’s shoulder. 

“I miss you.” 

“I’m right here.” 

“No. I miss  _ you _ .” Link nibbled at his fingernail. 

Rhett caught his wrist and gently removed it from in front of his mouth. “What do you mean?”

“You.” Link curled closer. “I miss the way you smell, I miss your voice at nighttime when you tell me stories. I miss your songs and lullabies and the way you cut the sandwiches like that, ‘cause Christy doesn’t. I miss being with you. I miss not talking and sitting with you. I miss going to the zoo or the park. I miss taking naps while you work and I get to sit in your lap. I miss the way your hugs make me feel safe, like nothin’ can get to me ever. I just miss  _ you _ .” Link grabbed his shirt in both hands and Rhett sighed. 

“I miss me too.” He wrapped his arms around Link and rested his chin on Link’s shoulder. “But not as much as I miss you. I miss seeing you all sleepy in the morning, lookin’ at me like I mean everything. I miss singing you songs and reading you books. I miss the way you fall asleep in my arms like I’m some kind of magic thing. I miss the way you trust me to help you take a bath, or to get you food. I miss hearing you call me ‘Bubba’. I miss the way it feels to carry you when you’re asleep, this warm weight of perfectly trusting human that thinks I’m amazing...it’s a feeling I can hardly describe, getting to take care of you. I even miss when you get all out of sorts and bite me.” 

That got him a wet laugh as Link swiped at his eyes. Sharing like this was good, cathartic even. Rhett only hoped it would help them get back to being them. Eventually he swapped to droning on about nothing until Link fell asleep against him, hands tightly gripped in Rhett’s shirt. 

By the time his timer went off, Link was deeply asleep. Rhett wiped his eyes and kissed Link’s forehead as he passed him to Christy. 

“I love you, buddy. Get some good sleep for me. I’ll see you again soon.” 


	11. Chapter 11

“Hey.” 

“Hey,” Christy stuck her hands in her sweater pockets and accepted the hug Rhett offered. 

“How is he?” 

She pulled back and accepted Mark’s kiss on the cheek. “He’s very little and asking for you every five minutes.” She gave a wry smile. 

“Amy says she and Sean went home for a few days?” Mark fell into step with the two of them as they meandered up the drive. 

“Yeah. Poor little guy caught a bug at daycare and she didn’t want Link to get it.” 

“Is my mom still here?” 

“She’s around, probably taking the dogs for a walk.” She held the door open, letting the two men head inside first. “Mark, make yourself at home. There’s cocoa in the kitchen and leftovers in the fridge if you’re hungry. Rhett,” she laughed at Link’s insistent grabby hands from the play-pen. “Well, you know where you need to go. I’ll be upstairs gathering laundry if anyone needs me.” 

“I’ll help, if you don’t mind,” Mark offered. “I feel kind of useless when I’m here. I’d like to be able to help for a change.” 

“Sure. You can strip the sheets and I’ll grab towels.” 

Rhett was gone before she’d finished speaking, instantly grabbing Link from baby jail. He didn’t care what Mark and Christy were up to. 

“Hi, buddy,” He murmured, holding Link close. “I missed you a lot this week.” He ignored the hovering presence of his assigned classification officer in favor of sitting down on the sofa. “Look,” Rhett tugged his phone out of his pocket. “I took a video for you. You want to see some fishies?” 

Link curled close and poked lightly at the screen, watching the giant koi moving smoothly through the water of the fountain. 

“Those fishies always make me think of you,” Rhett told him honestly. “Every day i go out there and see them, because you’d love them.” The video ended and Link squirmed in his lap. “Where ya goin’, bo?” Link squirmed more insistently. “What?” Rhett put his phone down and let Link squirm for a minute until he was turned around facing him, hands on his shoulders. “Oh, hi there.” 

Link patted at Rhett’s face, running his fingers through Rhett’s beard. 

“I know. I let my beard grow out didn’t I?” Rhett ran a hand through his hair. “My hair’s curly now, too.” 

Link followed suit, patting at Rhett’s hair, running his hands through it quietly. Rhett rubbed at his back, soaking in the soft attention. This was what he missed. Quiet, undisturbed baby attention, Link just being texture enthralled, messing up his hair or his beard, patting at his face. It was sweet. Pure. 

“I missed you.” Rhett pulled Link closer. “You lost weight.” He murmured, examining the fading scar on Link’s arm from the snake bite. Link felt far too light for his liking. “C’mere,” he pressed a soft kiss to the mark. “Come here lemme look at you real good.” He stood Link on his feet, standing up to examine him. “We gotta get some more meat on your bones, buddy.” Link’s face was leaner than he was used to, his elbows and hips sticking out a bit more than he was used to. Link looked at him, sucking on his cat pacifier and blinking quietly. He reached out and took Rhett’s hand, dragging him toward the kitchen. 

“Whatcha doin’?” 

Link led him around the table and pointed to the fridge. 

“Oh, buddy. Did you make me art?” The picture was very clearly Rhett, the slightly smaller figure to the left was supposed to be Link. 

Link nodded shyly. 

“I love it. Thank you.” Rhett kissed his cheek and Link squirmed happily. “Can I hold you please, sweet boy?” 

Link reached out and Rhett scooped him up. Apparently this was the belated effects of coming down off his hormone suppressant pills. They’d let him stop taking them 48 hours before he was supposed to see Link again, so they could essentially completely re-bond with each other. Rhett kissed Link’s cheek, making Link giggle softly. “I love you. All I’ve wanted this week is to see you.” Link gripped at his shirt and nuzzled at his neck. Rhett held him tightly, swaying a bit. “Missed you.” he repeated for the billionth time. “So much. You’re such a good boy. I love you so much.” Link baby-signed Rhett’s name again and again, nonverbal but clearly happy at the attention. “Yeah, bo. I’m right here.” 

By the time he got back to the sofa, Link was beaming. “There’s my happy boy.” he murmured. “I love you.” Rhett snagged a discarded picture book from the coffee table. “Lemme read to you. Let’s read a story, huh? Look, here. Lookit these doggies.” The bright pictures had Link humming and pointing at the pages, touching each bright illustration with inquisitive fingers. Rhett read him the story with all voices included, stopping every so often to kiss him again and listen to the sweet giggles. The story devolved into him purposefully nibbling at Link’s neck five minutes later, just to hear his laughter at Rhett’s beard scratching him. He rucked up Link’s shirt and flipped him over, kissing all over his belly. Link laughed so hard his binky fell out of his mouth, squirming against the sofa. Rhett was glowing. He hadn’t felt so happy in a long time. Maybe not since the early years, when they were settling into that first studio together. 

Eventually he had to stop, given that Link had laughed himself into a wet diaper. Grumpily peering at Rhett over his binky, Link reached out with grabby hands. “Yeah, I know. Bubba can take care of you, right?” Rhett rose, feeling confident as he pulled Link into his arms. “Let’s go up and get you fixed up.” Two hours last meeting had been extended to two and a half this time. His one and a half notice came just as he was taking Link up the stairs. “Yeah, thanks.” he murmured, mostly ignoring the officer as he moved upstairs. Mark and Christy were chatting in the master suite as he brought Link inside. 

“Hey, you two. Christy, where’s his changing stuff? Lil’ dude laughed so much he’s wet now.” 

“I thought I heard happy laughs,” She stood up and beamed at Link, smoothing his hair. “Did you and Bubba have fun? Hmm?” Link hid in Rhett’s neck. “Oh, don’t be shy, baby. Are you giving Bubba some good cuddles? I bet he missed those good cuddles.” 

Rhett held Link closer. “You bet I did.” 

Christy peered at him closely. “You’re riding high right now, aren’t you?” She let out a little laugh. “I can tell. Your eyes.” 

“The hormones hit about as soon as I walked in the door.” he confirmed, taking Link’s hand and kissing his fingers softly as he started up his little baby pats to Rhett’s chest. “Diapers?” 

“Master bath. Your mom had him in there before she left.” 

“Okay, lil’ man. Let’s get you changed and cozy.” 

Rhett moved quickly into the bathroom and made a beeline for the soft changing mat. “There we go, buddy. You’re gonna be my good boy, aren’t you? Be so good for me while I get you all cozy.” He put Link down and tugged the box of supplies towards him. “You’re so good, Link,” he worked the pajama pants down Link’s legs to his ankles. “My good boy.” Rhett rubbed at Link’s belly to calm his squirming. “Just a minute, bo. Bubba has to clean you up.” 

* * *

He made quick work of getting Link cleaned up, nothing but flashbacks running through his mind: Link’s nap schedule being so fucked after they’d started their studio up and running, his mom being nothing but a steady rock in helping him take care of Link, those endless back to back recording for music videos...it had been stressful. But he wouldn’t trade it. It was their life. It was the start of everything they’d worked for, everything they were now. And he wanted that sense of organic instinct back. The kind that led him to take on responsibility as Link’s Caregiver in the first place. He remembered decorating the studio together, picking out a space for Link, in case he needed downtime at work. His mom had brought in a gliding rocking chair and a bed, spent hours sprucing up a corner of the main room, getting walls put up so that they could create a haven for Link when he needed one. They’d kept the door locked, not really told anyone what was in there. Link was terrified they wouldn’t make it too far if anyone knew. Especially when Commercial Kings came along. They’d kept on tenterhooks trying to hide his classification, to keep him safe, to ease his mind. It wasn’t easy, but then again once they’d finally come clean about things it hadn’t been all that easy either. But since he’d re-gained his access to the internet, the positive response to his snafu had been overwhelming. True, there were the ones that wanted to yank Link right out of his custody, but there were far more like Mark that were coming out of the woodwork about their own issues. Supporting him and sending him well wishes and hoping he’d be right back with Link soon. 

Rhett finished washing his hands and scooped Link back up, just holding him for a moment. “I love you. I’m so sorry that I had to leave you for a while. But I’ll be back soon. We’ll be back soon.” It didn’t matter that Link probably couldn’t understand him. He had to get the words out anyway. “We’re gonna be better than ever. I promise.” 

Rhett pressed a kiss to Link’s cheek. “I promise, okay?” 

Link snuggled closer with a little sigh. “I know you don’t understand right now, buddy. But I gotta let you know this. I promise we’re okay. We’re gonna be fine.” 

Link gripped at his shirt. “I know, bo. I miss you too.” Rhett kissed his cheek again. “C’mon. Let’s you and me go back down. I’ll feed you and then I gotta go. But I’ll see you again Friday.” 

Rhett fed Link his naptime bottle, perhaps a bit slower than usual since he was being selfish, and then got him tucked in upstairs. Far too soon for his liking, the classifications officer was coming back and telling him he had to leave. 

“Can I at least wait till he’s asleep? He’s gonna throw a massive tantrum if I leave while he’s trying to fall asleep.” 

“Five minutes.” 

He turned back to the bed and rearranged the blankets. “I love you. Please go to sleep, Bumblebee. I’ll be back soon.” 

Link fell asleep happily, none the wiser that when he woke up Rhett wouldn’t be there. 

He traipsed back down the stairs and hugged Christy goodbye. 

“Keep your eyes open. I’ve got an idea.” She nodded and hugged Mark. 

“Will do.” 

* * *

“So what’s the big idea?” Mark settled into the seat and watched Rhett fiddling with his hoodie. 

“I’m thinking. I’m still on media blackout. Fans can’t access any of my media profiles.” 

“And?” 

“I was thinking earlier about how...all this has changed since I first was his Caregiver. And since we first started doing this.” 

“Oh, yeah?” 

“I want to turn my Instagram private. Not private like, fully private or anything but...I don’t want it to be work related. I want my Instagram, while Twitter and the RhettandLink accounts stay work related, to be something special. Something more personal to me. I want my Instagram to be related to my journey as a Caregiver. I think it would be helpful following this stuff from a PR standpoint, but I also think that more than that, it would help me feel more competent about being Link’s Caregiver.” 

“Not a bad idea. I think you might be right, but I mean, those trolls are always gonna troll. I think you should--even though you don’t need me to tell you this--just be aware that even when you do this, people will still fight back. But from what I’ve seen, your fan base is overwhelmingly supportive of you guys. Take a day or two, think it over. But whatever you do, I’ll support it.” 


	12. Chapter 12

**Summary for the Chapter:**

> The one where things start to patch up, and everyone including the author is grateful.

**Notes for the Chapter:**

> Sorry for the long hiatus. Life happened. But I'm back now with better opportunities and a better frame of mind. That being said, this might be shorter but I'm so happy to be back in this verse and writing again. Hopefully I can keep to a better schedule for updates now that I'm working through things.

Rhett wasn’t too sure what he’d find inside the door as he stared down at his sneakers, contrasting brightly against the weathered surface of the porch steps. He raised a sweaty fist and knocked a couple times, watching the curtain over the windows shake a little. The door opened and Link stood there, bumblebee paci in his mouth and hair mussed--he’d woken up not long ago, Rhett would guess. Link cocked his head to the side in confusion, looked at the bag Rhett was holding in one hand, and hummed curiously. 

Rhett set the duffle down softly and bent a little--yeah, he didn’t really have to but with Link in that headspace he felt like it helped at least a little bit-- resting his hands on his thighs. 

“I’m home.” 

Not what he’d wanted to say, but it was what came out anyway, and it felt _right_. _God,_ saying those words felt right. He scrutinized Link’s face carefully, actually holding his breath a little as he waited for Link to react. 

Link was quiet for a minute, staring at him with that crease between his eyebrows--eyebrows disappearing right up into his hairline like they did when he was thinking-- before a bright smile spread across his face behind his pacifier. 

Rhett straightened up and beamed right back. “C’mere, you.” 

Link gave a pure giggle and launched himself towards Rhett. 

Rhett picked him up and held on tight. “Oh, I’m never gonna put you down again.” He said fervently. “Like, ever. Not ever again.  _ Gosh, _ I missed you.” 

Link sighed happily, perfectly comfortable to have cuddles again. Rhett laughed softly. “Guess you’d be okay with that. You’d be okay with cuddles all day forever, wouldn’t you?” 

They stayed like that, the girls obviously hovering around the door for their chance to say hello, but respectfully holding back. 

“My bubba.” 

“All yours.” Rhett agreed, patting Link’s back. “Now let’s get inside, okay?” Rhett grabbed his bag on the way through the door, dumping it again as soon as he’d kicked the door shut. 

“Bubba.” Link repeated again, pulling back with a giant smile, one hand gripping his binky. 

“Bumblebee.” Rhett tapped his nose, delivering an equally large smile. “There he is! There’s Link! Look, I can see your face now that your binky isn’t in the way!” 

Link happily nuzzled up to Rhett’s shoulder again, patting at his chest with his free hand. 

“Um. Hi.” Rhett murmured awkwardly to his little audience. “Where’s Mom?” 

“She took the stuff on ahead to the house. She said she didn’t trust herself not to whoop you quite yet.” Christy said with a tentative smile. 

“Fair. Jess? You good? Talk later?” 

Jessie nodded and hiked her backpack up higher on her shoulder. “We’ll talk.” She agreed. “Just missed you is all. We were worried about you.” 

“Well you don’t gotta worry anymore.” He assured, kissing her cheek as she followed Christy out the door. “I’ll call you in a few days. Promise. Right now I just gotta…” he gestured vaguely and she nodded. “Sort this all out.” he finished, speaking to the closed door. 

  
  
  


Rhett took a deep breath and held Link closer, breathing in the soft scent clinging to Link’s skin. Baby lotion, laundry detergent, and an underlying hint of vanilla that said his mom had been there at some point recently. Link patted at his cheek softly. 

“Yeah. Missed you lots too.” Rhett mumbled with a little smile, blinking away traitorous tears. He couldn’t cry now, not when he was actually  _ happy _ for the first time in weeks. 

“Let’s go and sit down. You wanna watch tv for a little bit?” Link shook his head. “No?” Link squirmed until Rhett set him on his feet. “Where ya goin’, there, Link?” Link shuffled clumsily towards his play area and gestured impatiently for Rhett to follow. “You wanna play for a little bit?” Link nodded happily, plopping down on the mat and shoving a stuffed animal towards him. “Okay. We’ll play and then we can have dinner. Christy says somebody’s gotten pretty used to having bottles lately.” Link wiggled on the spot, eyes large and happy as he held out the toy elephant. “Looks like you have a new friend. I bet Nana got you this one. She loves spoiling you, Link. Your new friend seems nice.” He gave all the obligatory small talk one would give a little one showing off their newest toys. 

Link held it up again. Rhett raised his brows. “You want me to give her kisses?” he guessed.

Link nodded. 

“Okay. Here.” Rhett leaned forward and kissed the animal’s head obligingly. “There we go.” 

Link reached out and made little grabby hands. Rhett stifled a smile. He knew this game. They’d played it a thousand times before with anything from a stuffed animal to Jade.

“Oh, I see. Link wants kisses too, huh?” Rhett couldn’t suppress the wave of happiness that washed over him at the action. His boy was too cute. 

“Okay, hold still.” 

Rhett leaned forward, pressing several soft kisses across Link’s face. He took his time with every single one of them, relishing the contact after being absent for so long.

Link giggled softly and Rhett felt like a piece of the puzzle fell back into place. Maybe, sometimes, even after so long being played with that you knew the order...sometimes pieces still got put in the wrong place. He was just glad he’d finally found the right angle for this one again. This was one piece he hadn’t known he needed quite so badly until it popped out of place for a while. 

“God, I missed this. I sure did miss you.” Rhett told him honestly. Link put his binky back in his mouth and hummed softly, like he did when he knew Rhett was feeling down but didn’t know how to really make words. 

Link crawled all the way into his lap and Rhett wrapped his arms around his waist. “I Love you, so, so much, Bumblebee. Sure did miss you while I was off being so silly like that.” 

Link patted his cheek as if to say ‘that’s okay’, but Rhett just took his hand and kissed his fingers. 

“It isn’t really okay, though.” He mumbled. “I left you. But I’m here now and we’re gonna make it okay. I promise.” 


	13. Chapter 13

**Notes for the Chapter:**

> hello, sorry i am terrible at updates, pls have this as an apology

“Well. This is new.” 

Not that Rhett wasn’t already experiencing everything with Link as if it were new anyway. They were getting to know each other again, re-establishing routines. But Link crying every time he put him down? 

“Alright. Okay, I’ll pick you up again, hang on.” Rhett dried his hands. Dishes could wait. “C’mere.” He picked Link up and the crocodile tears stopped immediately as he nestled close. “There. That’s what you wanted, right?” 

Link didn’t answer. 

“Well. We’ve been up for two hours now. I guess I won’t be getting much done today besides giving you cuddles, huh, Link?” 

Link curled closer and gripped at Rhett’s shirt with the hand that wasn’t holding onto his binky. 

“Okay.” Rhett carried Link into the living room and sat down on the couch. “Let’s just sit here. Just lemme hold you.” 

Apparently he needed it just as much as Link did. Rhett settled in and wrapped both arms around Link. “I love you.” Link pressed his face into Rhett’s neck. “I love you so much, bud.” 

“Loves.” 

“You love me too?” 

He felt Link nod into his neck. “Well I bet you don’t love me nearly as much as I love you.” “Ummm big loves.” Link clarified, gripping Rhett’s shirt loosely in one hand.

“Big loves, huh? That’s a lot.” Rhett patted Link’s back. “We gotta get you over to see Ms. Kristy later, Bumblebee.” Link pulled back and raised one eyebrow in question. “We gotta go talk to her together,” he pushed Link’s hair back off his forehead. “And we can play with the Play-Doh, and draw pictures, or paint at the painting station…” Link didn’t look convinced. “We’ll have to eat lunch fast though in order to get there in time for your session.” Something flashed across Link’s eyes, but it was gone as quick as it had shown up. He pointed and Rhett let him down to play with the Legos. 

After a quick clean of the downstairs, Rhett managed to get Link to eat half a sandwich before they had to get ready to leave. He wasn’t entirely sure what the session would hold, what with how up and down Link’s moods had been the last few weeks. He just hoped they could get some sort of response out of Link and he wouldn’t be the only one talking. Link let him put his socks and shoes on without fussing, clutching his blanket tightly the entire way to the counseling center. Rhett hadn’t had anything to eat. He couldn’t quite make himself eat anything when his nerves were running so high. After all, it was the first day he’d been trusted to take care of Link since all this began. He pulled into the parking lot and cut the engine, twisting around to stare at Link. 

“You ready to go inside?” Rhett wiped his palms on his jeans before opening the door and helping Link get unbuckled from his safety harness. “C’mon, bo. Let’s get inside.” Link took his hand, watching uncertainly as Rhett slung the strap to his bag over his shoulder. They walked in silently, Link’s grip just as tight against Rhett’s hand as his was to Link’s. He scribbled their names on the clipboard and the time they’d arrived, and they sat down beside one another. Rhett’s stomach twisted painfully. Whatever happened, it was likely to take a few sessions before things hashed themselves out. The ten minutes went by with all the tension of an approaching thunderstorm. They hadn’t stopped holding hands since Link got out of the car, and Rhett was dying to know what was going on inside his head. 

“Link?”

The aide in the bright purple scrub pants and the electric teal shirt smiled at them from the doorway. “Ms. Kristy is ready for you.” 

Rhett stood up. “C’mon, Link.” He coaxed. “Let’s go.” 

Link sat there for long enough that Rhett and the aide began to exchange worried glances. 

“Link?” She asked again. “Ms. Kristy is really excited to see you today. I think it might make her sad if you didn’t come and say hello.” 

He slid out of the chair and let go of Rhett’s hand, brushing right past the aide and down the hall to Kristy’s office. Rhett blinked. “Uh, sorry? I guess? Things have been…” he made a vague gesture and she smiled, checking Link’s name off her list. 

“No worries. I guess you guys don’t need me to show you to her office, then?” 

Rhett let out a dry chuckle and headed around the corner. “No. Guess we don’t.”

By the time he got to Kristy’s office and shut the door, Link was already plopped in front of the low table, mashing a blob of red Play-Doh between his hands. 

“Hello, Rhett,” Kristy gave him a professional smile. “It’s been a while since I’ve seen you both.”

He sat down on the sofa and dropped Link’s bag by his feet. “Um. I guess I don’t have to tell you why we’re here. I’m assuming you already know. But uh, if we could just forget me for a while...I’d like to just make sure he’s, y’know, doing okay and everything. If you could just forget that I’m here, I’d uh, I’d appreciate that a lot. It just seems like I’ve had way too much therapy lately and Link hasn’t had enough.” 

She wrote something down in her notes with a little frown. “Okay, but if he brings you up or wants you to be in the conversation, you promise you’ll engage?” 

Rhett nodded. “I promise. I just wanna know he’s okay.” 

“Fair enough.” She angled herself in the chair so she was facing Link more openly. “Link, what are you making? You barely had time to come in the door before you were at the Play-Doh table.” 

He put the ball down on the flat surface and smashed it with a fist. The brighter, happier, colors she’d set out had been foregone completely in favor of the deep red. Link picked up the flattened mound and threw it against the table, a dull smack sounding at his action. He scraped it up and began again, getting more aggressive each time he tossed the ball at the table. Link didn’t answer the question, or even address Kristy was there. Rhett wondered if he’d even spared her a second thought once he’d gotten inside the office door. He leaned forward a little and watched as Link methodically shaped it into a ball, set it down, and smashed it with his fist a few times. 

“That seems pretty angry, Link. Are you upset? Do you feel like this?” Kristy rummaged through her box of engagement tools until she came up with the metal rings with the feelings cards attached. “Does this one look like how you feel?” She held out the page with the picture of the ‘angry’ face on it. “You don’t have to say anything, Link. You can just nod if this picture is how you’re feeling.” 

Link paused as he got ready to mound the Play-Doh up once more and gave her a half-nod. 

“Thank you, Link,” She put the chart away again and wrote down a few notes. “It’s okay to feel angry. You’ve had a lot of big feelings lately according to Christy. And that’s okay. Because you’ve had a lot of things that have been hard to decide what to do with that have happened to you lately, right? Your friends came to stay, and Bubba wasn’t there and everything was pretty confusing, huh?” 

Link threw the lump across the room. 

“How about we go draw something now? Do you want to come and draw pictures with me, Link?” Kristy didn’t scold him for throwing the Play-Doh. She simply moved over to the corner where she’d set out some sheets of paper and a tub of crayons. “I think I’m going to draw a picture of my puppy. What are you going to draw, Link?” Kristy began to draw her picture methodically, just sitting there alone, leaving the invitation open until Link came slinking over, plopping into the chair across from her. 

Rhett watched closely. He poked around with one finger in the tub of crayons for a few minutes, before placing his selections in a haphazard line beside the paper. 

“I love my puppy,” Kristy continued with a little smile. “Her name is Daisy. I hear you have a puppy, too, Link. What’s your puppy’s name?” 

Link picked up a crayon and wrapped his hand around it, scribbling heavily. Black. He didn’t normally use darker colors when he was drawing, unless it was green for grass or brown for Jade’s fur. The fact that he wouldn’t even open up to talk about Jade was worrying, for certain. Link hadn’t taken his binky out since before they got in the car. Kristy continued talking about her dog, keeping a careful eye on Link’s art. The longer she talked, the darker his art became. Red and cobalt and black and grey--never ever colors Link typically picked. He knew the folder that Kristy kept had Link’s previous works of art in it, and that none of them had ever gotten this worrying. 

“Link, honey?” She leaned forward. “You’ll break the crayon if you keep pushing so hard.” Kristy cautioned. 

Link continued in his state of near-catatonic focus, the black crayon bowing under the weight of the pressure until it snapped in half, the front part flying across the table. He stopped moving, locking eyes with Kristy for a split second before he burst into tears. 

“I’m going to move your paper, okay, Link?” Kristy hurried to get the artwork out of the way before his tears could make it unrecognizable or a fit of toddler upset caused him to rip the paper. He’d colored so hard in spots that it ripped through the paper. She set it aside and held out her hand. “Do you want to hold my hand?” 

Link reached out and held on tightly. 

“Link, it’s okay that you broke the crayon. We can replace a crayon. But sometimes things happen that make us feel like that crayon on the inside. Things push so hard on us that we break just like that crayon did when you pushed too hard. I think maybe with everything that’s happened to you lately, you started to feel like this crayon. Is that true? Did you break on the inside?” 

Link spit out his binky and let out an absolutely pitiful sob. He tried to speak a few times, but he was far too worked up to get anything out. 

“You don’t have to talk. You can just nod like we did before.” 

Link nodded. 

“You did? That’s okay. I’m your friend, remember? You can talk to me about things that hurt, or things that make you feel sad. And I’ll help you figure out how to fix it.” She reached into a drawer with one hand. “Like this tape. I can fix the crayon if you let go of my hand.” 

Link scrubbed at his eyes. 

“It’s okay. I’ll hold your hand again once I’m done, okay?” 

He let go, watching carefully as Kristy picked up the two pieces of crayon. She tore a strip off the roll, and carefully wrapped the gaffer tape around the crayon, making it more stable than if she’d used regular Scotch tape. “See? Now I can draw with it again.” Kristy made a few strokes across her paper. 

Link stuck his hand out and she put the bandaged crayon down. “Let’s go sit on the couch, okay? Do you want to sit with Bubba for a little bit and talk to me?” She stood up and led Link over to the sofa. “Can you sit down with Bubba, please?” Link sat down next to Rhett and picked up his blanket, letting out a quiet whine as he held it close. 

“Rhett? Do you uh, maybe want to jump into things now?” 

Rhett nodded and licked his lips. It hurt like a kick to the gut seeing Link react this way. He wiped at his eyes and leaned forward. “Um. Yeah, I can...I can talk now. Um. I just...I guess I feel kind of angry too, also at myself,” he turned a little and looked over at Link. “I’m mad at myself for making you hurt like that. But I felt…” Rhett had to remind himself that while there was a qualified therapist in the room that could understand his usage of multi-syllable words, Link wasn’t really in a mindset to be able to do that. 

He searched for more kid-friendly wording. “I felt...really sad. And like I wasn’t good enough to take care of you anymore, and that scared me. I just got so scared that I was gonna do something wrong or something bad that I ran away. I did what we’re not supposed to do.” He sucked in a breath and tried to give Link a half-sincere smile. “Instead of talking about my feelings I just ran away, and that was….” Rhett stopped to remind himself once again that he had to water things down. “That was bad, right?” 

Link seemed engaged, listening as he talked. A few seconds ticked by before he actually graced Rhett’s question with a nod. “I did a bad thing, Link. And I made you feel like that broken crayon, and it’s not good to treat people that way. Especially not people that are as special as you are, ‘cause you’re pretty damn special, Link.” He wiped at his eyes again and had to chuckle at Link’s response. 

“Ba’ wor’s.” 

“Yeah, Bubba said a bad word.” 

Link sniffled and reached out. “Umm, love.”

Rhett let him climb into his lap. 

“Was no nice. Bubba stays homes. Not leaves. Umm, sad. An’ um, mad.” Link held on tight. “But Bubba stays. No mores leaves. ‘Cause Link love. An’ um, an’ is good togethers.” 

“Do you forgive Bubba, Link?” Kristy broke in softly. “Do you know what that word means?” 

Link peeked out at her from Rhett’s shoulder. 

“That word means that you still love him and you know he loves you even after what he did. That doesn’t mean that what he did was right, but it means you’re not mad at him anymore and that you want to fix things like with the crayon. Do you want to fix things together with Bubba, the way we fixed the crayon?” 

Link nodded. 

“I’m proud of you, Link. Do you think that when you come back on Wednesday, we can talk some more about this?” 

He nodded again. 

Rhett cleared his throat. “I think we can do that.” 

“It’s time for my next appointment, but I think we made some good progress today.” 

“I think we did, too.” He murmured. “But it’s time to get this boy home so he can take a nap.”


	14. Chapter 14

By seven o’clock that night, reality had set in--and it hit hard. It wasn’t until Link was tugging on his sleeve asking for food that he realized what he’d done. Rhett moved like he’d been scalded, jumping off the sofa and picking him up. 

“I’m so sorry, Link.” Rhett threw some chicken nuggets on a tray and haphazardly shoved it in the oven. “I’m sorry. I’m really sorry, I bet you’re really hungry, huh?” Link looked a little whiplashed, clinging to Rhett’s shirt with his fingers and frowning anxiously. He hadn’t had to ask Rhett for things in years. Once they settled into a rhythm after that first rocky year things had flowed smoothly, Link hadn’t had to ask because Rhett just sort of...knew. He’d been around Link long enough to just know his preferences and be able to predict what he might want at the moment he wanted or needed it. Even with the added stress of Commercial Kings, their rhythm had barely been impacted. He’d still been able to make sure all their needs were met and that Link barely had to ask for anything. 

“I’m sorry.” Rhett said again, pulling open the fridge and filling a sippy cup with some juice. He supposed he had his lucky stars (and mostly Christy) to thank for the fact that the fridge and pantry were fully stocked with all Link’s favorites. She’d even clipped a note to the fridge with a schedule of what times she’d been feeding and bathing him. At the bottom she’d written a little ‘good luck--and don’t forget bathroom breaks’ which gave him some initial pause. As if he’d forget to do that basic thing. Then again, he supposed, he’d just forgotten to feed Link for the majority of the day. They hadn’t even done snack time. It seemed an entire life ago when he’d had such a good schedule set up, and he knew what to do. He set up a place setting on the spill-proof mat sitting in front of Link’s place at the table and put Link in his chair. 

“Can you sit while I go get the food out of the oven?” 

Link nodded and the look on his face-- holy hell but that uncertain almost scared look on his face--nearly brought Rhett to his knees. He hurried to yank the tray from the oven, four of the nuggets sliding off to the floor. Rhett set the tray down and scraped them back up. No sense in wasting a few good dino nuggets. He put five on Link’s plate and added ten grapes. 

“Remember to eat slow.” Rhett set the plate down and wandered out of the kitchen. That same uncomfortable clawing heart racing feeling that had landed him in this situation in the first place was cropping up again. 

He grabbed his phone and dialed the number they’d given him when he’d checked out of Willow Springs. The line only rang twice before someone picked up. 

“Dr. Arlow,” the easy voice filtered through the line and Rhett felt his shoulders relax just a fraction of an inch. 

“It’s Rhett.” There was no disguising the panic in his voice. “It’s happening again.” 

“Deep breaths, Rhett. Can you tell me what has you so upset? You sound like something’s got you pretty afraid.” He could hear Arlow opening and closing his desk drawers, then writing something down. Probably his case file. 

Rhett made a mental note to send John Arlow whatever the hell he wanted when all this was over. He never got rattled, not even if Rhett got so worked up he yelled during a session. He’d even broken a vase once knocking it off the table and Arlow had simply asked an aide to bring him a broom. “You know that feeling I told you about? The one that made me want to leave in the first place? It’s happening again and I’m just so fucking inadequate and I can’t be here anymore.” 

There was a split second before Link was running into the room, flinging himself at Rhett in a bundle of arms and legs. 

“Leave?” He asked, heartbroken in a way Rhett had never seen him before, not even when he’d actually left. 

Rhett choked on his own oxygen, Link clinging to him so tight he felt like it might leave a bruise. “Rhett? What’s going on? Is everything okay?” 

Rhett choked out a half-gasp and picked Link up. “Oh my God.” he collapsed onto the sofa and held Link close, the phone pushed so hard against his ear it hurt. “He thought I was leaving.” 

“Link did?” 

“He thought I was leaving, I forgot to feed him and then I left him sitting by himself and he thought I was leaving.” 

\--------------------

After that first intense night, Link wouldn’t be separated from Rhett again. Link couldn’t take it and Rhett didn’t want to hurt him again. He decided to call Dr. Arlow every day whether they spent an entire session speaking or not. It was four days before anything else happened. Rhett had expected Link to retaliate by spending most of his time in headspace, and he’d expected them to eventually address the situation--just not like this. It was raining, something he always counted a blessing rather than a nuisance since they’d moved to California. Link was still asleep, so he tucked a blanket around him and carried him to sit on the porch swing together. It was easier when Link was asleep, because he didn’t have to remember to do anything. He could just hold him and bask in the warm attention of a sleeping Little. When he was sleeping, Rhett didn’t have to worry that any of his needs were met, or that he’d screwed up again. He knew that if he had a blanket and a comfort item, Link was okay. And Link would be okay for a few hours. Naps and nighttime had become Rhett’s refuge in a way they weren’t before. He used to use them to get things done around the house. Now he just sat in the living room and stared at the baby monitor and cried. He was raw. More raw than he’d been even when he was at Willow Springs. At least there he had other Caregivers to talk to, and Mark dropped by regularly. Now everyone had backed off so quickly and so far that he felt like he was floundering, even with the trips to see Link’s therapist and calling Dr. Arlow every day. Being together just the two of them like that was startling, harsh, and he wasn’t sure he knew what to do. 

Rhett kicked his foot and gently started the swing moving, holding Link close and listening to the gentle snuffles of his sleeping breaths. He tucked the blanket closer around Link’s neck and Link gripped at his shirt with sleepy hands. It was nice, for a while. Sitting there listening to the rain and holding onto Link, just basking in the peace of the moment and thinking of ways he could continue to offer some sort of penance for what he’d done. Maybe he could take him to the zoo, or buy him new toys, or they could fingerpaint together. Nothing seemed like enough to be able to apologize for the way he’d gone and ripped a hole in Link’s life like that. Link mumbled something innocent in his sleep, something about bunnies, and Rhett rubbed his back through the blanket. 

“Yeah, buddy. Sleepy bunnies.” 

The way Link stilled under his hand made Rhett shatter into a thousand pieces--he still trusted him even after all he’d done. How could he still trust him with anything? He’d even forgotten to feed him for several hours and Link didn’t seem to bear him any ill will for that. It wasn’t something Rhett could understand. He felt his chest constrict and held Link closer, as if his innocence could somehow soothe the turmoil Rhett was feeling. Who was he? It was rare for something to happen that shattered his sense of identity so far into the aether like this. It hadn’t happened in decades, and when it had, Link had been right there to walk with him through it. Not this time. 

“Don’ feel bad,” the comment was so soft that Rhett wasn’t sure he’d really heard it over the rain pattering against the metal roof. He looked down. Link’s eyes were halfway open, sleepy in that just-awakened stupor as he tilted his head to see Rhett better. 

“How’d you know I was feeling bad?” he murmured quietly. 

“Jus’ do. C’n tell.” Link’s hand closed over his shirt, right above where his heart was beating out an anxious rhythm. “Know you too good.” 

“You’re not supposed to be able to tell that. I’m the grownup.” Rhett replied with a frown, resting his hand against Link’s disheveled hair. 

“Grownups don’ always know wha’s best,” Link dragged his spare hand up lazily (Rhett envied that he’d gotten such good sleep. But at least one of them had) and tugged his pacifier out of his mouth, just holding it in his hand. “But know you more than grownups. My best friend.” He yawned and rubbed his face against Rhett’s shirt. 

Rhett felt like he might start crying again if Link kept talking. It was like having a bucket of ice thrown on him, hearing Link come pushing to the surface like that just because Rhett couldn’t keep himself together. But he’d missed talking to him, and a huge selfish part of him said that even if he wasn’t all the way big, Rhett ought to keep him talking just to have him back for a while. 

Link smacked his lips together and let his eyes slip shut. “Jus’ missed you. Lots. You were sad, an’ that’s okay. But don’t like seein’ you cry. Hurts. But you gotta know you’re not s’posed to hurt an’ not tell people. Not tell me. You always used to tell me things. Now you don’t tell me stuff ever.” Link took a breath and pressed closer. Rhett tightened his grip, just in case Link changed his mind and decided to run away. Rhett wasn’t sure he could take that at the moment, if Link tried to leave. “Do you not tell me stuff anymore ‘cause you think I’m a baby?” The question slipped out with just enough pain behind it that Rhett felt like he’d been punched in the throat. 

He couldn’t find his breath for a good minute or so, and the longer he went without responding the more he felt Link slide that much toward crying because he thought what he’d said was true. 

“No,” Rhett managed to push the word past his uncooperative mouth. “No, Link,” once he started talking, the words flowed confidently. “I don’t think that at all, that’s absolutely not what I think. I think you’re a lot of things, but I’d never ever say that and mean it in a bad way. Haven’t I always used that in a good way? I mean, I hope I have, ‘cause the last thing I’d ever want to do is hurt you on purpose. I don’t want to hurt you on accident either but sometimes that happens and I get so inside my own head that I can’t figure out what to do or what to say to fix it. And right now, I think, is one of those times. I just...got so mixed up in my head that instead of talking with you about it and letting you know what I needed, I just...messed everything up instead.” 

“Ms Kristy says fixin’ mistakes is hard but you shouldn’t feel bad if it takes a long time to do.” Link piped up, eyes earnest as he sat up, blanket falling off his shoulders. It hurt like hell to finally make eye contact with him. Rhett wasn’t sure who he’d hurt more: his best friend, or the kid he’d taken care of for so long--both of whom were currently present in Link’s gaze and trying their best to make him feel better. Rhett bit his lip. 

“I’m just scared it might take us a long time to fix this one, and that you might not even want me anymore while we try.” he figured he ought to answer honestly, not kick him to the curb when he’d seen so little of Big Link since this had all kicked off. It felt stupid to vocalize that sentiment, but if he were to be completely honest, he  _ was _ worried that Link wouldn’t want him anymore because of the extent to which he’d fucked everything up. 

Link tilted his head like a puppy listening to something. “Don’t be silly.” He finally decided, staring at his pacifier before giving it a few sucks. “You’re silly.” he proclaimed, looking reluctant to remove the object from his mouth. He clutched it in his hand, extending one finger and moving to poke Rhett lightly in the chest. “That’s what matters. On the…” he seemed to be struggling to find his words, though he didn’t seem like he really wanted to fully retreat back into headspace quite yet. That selfish part of Rhett was insanely glad that Link didn’t seem to want to leave quite yet. “On the ‘in here’,” Link finally decided, tapping Rhett’s chest again. “S’what matters most, Rhett. An’ you always been good in there.” Rhett couldn’t help it. He gripped at Link’s wrist and locked eyes with him. “Say that again,” he begged. “Please.” 

Link’s eyes were a mix of determined and confused (likely because Rhett had stopped any routes of him getting his pacifier back to his mouth), but he did. 

“Always good on the inside.” he looked pleased that he’d finally recalled the word for ‘inside’, and Rhett had to admit he was proud of him. “My bes’ friend.” Link murmured, brows creasing. “But you’re sad, Rhett.” Link reached out with his other hand, poking lightly at Rhett’s cheek. “Don’t be sad. Smile.” 

“I don’t know if I know how to smile, anymore, Link.” It came out tired, but honest, and he was proud of himself for admitting it. Talking to Link was the only way they’d get through this thing, but Link just hadn’t been in a spot to seem like he was capable of it for a long time. Now that he was, Rhett realized he didn’t need to pass it up. Link’s frown deepened. “And I think most of that reason is ‘cause I hurt you. And Christy. And Jessie. I hurt all of you really bad,” he let go of Link’s wrist and his hand dropped to his side. “And that isn’t okay.”

“Maybe not okay, but you’re sorry?” 

“I can’t begin to say how sorry I am.” 

“If you feel bad ‘bout doin’ somethin’ an’ you’re sorry, then you don’t gotta keep feelin’ like that all the time.” Link decided. Rhett had to wonder where he’d been hearing all this, but between his therapy sessions while Rhett was away, and whatever Christy had been telling him, he had a good idea where Link had learned it all. Link reached down and held onto Rhett’s hand, right hand reaching across his body so he could keep holding his pacifier with the left. 

“You think I’m being too hard on myself?” 

Link nodded, taking a minute to suck on his pacifier again--Rhett realized he must be using it to help keep up his courage to have the conversation. He felt a twinge of regret that somehow he’d forced Link into this, but pushed it out of the way quickly. Link had woken with this on his mind, and when Link put his mind to something, Rhett couldn’t stand in his way. He didn’t really want to, either. He reached up and pushed Link’s hair back. 

“Then I promise I’ll try my best to stop being so hard on myself. Okay?”

Link nodded again, holding Rhett’s hand tighter. “And I promise I’ll talk whenever we go see Ms Kristy so we can try and get better together. Sound good?” 

Link tugged his binky out of his mouth. “Sounds good, Rhett. You don’t gotta be scared, even though it’s scary.” He toyed with Rhett’s fingers. 

“Are you scared, Link?” Rhett asked quietly. 

“Um. Scary when you cry.” He admitted. “Don’t like it an’ don’t like when you think I’m not noticing stuff.” 

“What if I promise to tell you if I feel sad? Does that work?” 

Link blinked, considering. “Okay. Love you.” 

“Love you too, buddy. You wanna just sit here for a while? I think we’ve talked about a lot of really hard things and I’d like to just hold you for a little bit.” 

Link seemed relieved, sucking on his pacifier more insistently. 

“C’mere.” Link burrowed back into his shoulder and he tucked the blanket back around him. “Let’s just sit here.” 


End file.
